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Tom Cattell

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I was the second cook onto the balcony!

In the immortal words of Freddy Mercury: 'Another one bites the dust!' Yet another in a long line of walts who make the mistake of Over-Walting - or at least suffer from terminal over-confidence.

Tom Cattell claimed to be one of the youngest servicemen to have fought in the 1950s Korean War and one of the oldest to fight in the Falklands.

Following the usual pattern of the amateur walt, Tom boy claimed to have served with the Parachute Regiment and you know who.

He finally managed to out himself (walticide) by sending a photo of himself - wearing (what otherwise would be) an incredible and unique group of medals - to the RAF to support his claim for a military pace stick. Quite why he'd want one of these is something known unto himself.

A little bit (probably not all that much actually) of checking and it was discovered that his glittering 30-year military career was all fake. Tom had been a cook for the SAS in Malaya at a rest centre and even then just for a couple of months. As for his awesome (and unlikely) array of tinware? Bought off ebay.

What Tom failed to realise is that whilst one can buy all manner of medals off ebay, what is less easily purchased is an entry in to the London Gazette - entries that accompany the award of medals such as the MM and BEM for example... which Tom unwisely decided to award himself. Day 1 walting skills sucker. Needless to say, had Tom bothered to read Walting With Confidence then the whole sorry train wreck of an affair could've been avoided.

Very sad story to be found here and here.

PS Tommy has also popped up in all sorts of unimaginable hell holes such as Truro, Saltash and Walt heaven, Essex too.