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Robert Mugabe

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Uncle Bob before he grew a 'tache

Robert Mugabe, or "Uncle Bob" as he is better known, is the President of Zimbabwe. He is a benevolent, liberal, and honourable man, much loved by the people of Zim and well respected in international circles.

Uncle Bobs career started in the 1960's as a freedom fighter with ZANU (Zimbabwe African National Union). Using techniques he had picked up from THEM whilst on a sneaky-beaky course at H, he really stuck it to those white-supremacist farmers in the Rhodesian Bush War. When the war was over, Uncle Bob held elections, and to save the people the trouble of having to visit polling booths, has rigged them ever since.

Uncle Bob enjoys walks in the country, listening to jazz and visiting French banks.

His political regime is much admired by New Labour, and they are trying to implement many of his policies in the United Kingdom.