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Pie

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Pies
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A gratuitous image.

Ambrosia & nectar combined - the food of the Gods.

A pie consists of a baked pastry shell which conveniently obscures the purchaser's view of its contents. The meat substitute contained therein often consists of "Whatever we can get away with putting in the mince!", to quote one butcher from a popular supermarket.

Particularly wholesome varieties can be purchased from all quality Spar stores, consisting largely of hydrogenated vegetable oil, as evidenced by the whitish scunge covering the pastry. Once this delight has crumbled away, the Pie Taster will encounter a delicious filling mostly consisting of gristle and gristle. The gristle may retain its natural grey colouration or be given an artificial pink hue under a form of artistic licence (in the same way that salmon are coloured).

Some types in for'n parts (i.e. Spams) mistakenly put fruit in their pies. The purpose of combining traditional pie values with curiously healthy ingredients remains unclear, but no good will come of it.

Immortalized in the song 'Who ate all the pies?' which is the defacto anthem for Spams and REMF's everywhere.

A sub-species of NAAFI Growler.

Potential health issues

A twenty-year government study claims to have found a correlation between pie eating and weight gain. However, this finding has provoked fierce debate and research into this controversial area continues.