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Oxford

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Dreaming spires and all that bollocks. 'Univwersity' aside, Oxfordshire's county capital is today no different than any other regional centre: full of half-naked tarts emptying the contents of their stomachs in bus shelters, whilst the 'lads' bare their arrses to the CCTV system. Quality.

Oxford is a city with a university (unlike Cambridge - which IS the university) and used to be quite a nice city too. But as with everything these days, the character that it had has been stripped bare by the building of cloned shopping centres and franchised high street outlets. There are some nice little spots though if you can be bothered to hunt them down.

The last bus back to Brize Norton from Oxford used to be right up there on the extreme sports list of things not to do. The heady mix of pissed up gobshyte 'yoofs' from Eynsham and Witney not gelling very well with the soldiery and airmenry returning to camp after a sensible evening of Bible study and Bridge class. Ho hum.