Mad Austrian Paedophile Fritzl kept his grandchildren in a cellar and fed them on nothing but sandwiches for twenty-four years. A good thing they were interbred. Unfortunately, Josef's feeble record attempt had long been eclipsed by the RAF, who've been feeding the Army inedible sarnies and keeping them in the dark for the best part of half a century.
Misunderstood Austrian eccentric, typified how a father should love his children. Metrosexual men all over the planet are locking their kids in underground dungeons and making them produce retarded, useless children in order that they can grow up to be imprisoned and sexually assaulted for generations to come.
The Austrians have taken their fondness for the Sound of Music too far. They even have their own Von Trapped family.