Beer

Introduction

One of the staples of the British soldier's life, beer is a simple wholesome product, made by fermenting sugars extracted from malted wheat or barley together with hops, for flavour, and water; maturing it to improve the taste; and thus creating a drink which, at its best, can set your eyeballs revolving in different directions whilst you are simultaneously convinced that you are:

• Rambo
• The Greatest Lover since Casanova
• The Greatest Singer since Elvis
• The Greatest Dancer since Fred Astaire (or John Travolta, if you're that way inclined)
• Irresistable to all women
• Witty just like Oscar Wilde
• Able to stand
• Cyril Clunge

Types of Beer

• Lager
• Bitter
• Stout
• Strange Foreign Beer
• Wobbly
• Weissbier
• Younger's Tartan Special and Scottish keg beers in general
• Real Ale