Zombies my Arrse

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by spent_case, Aug 18, 2009.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Science reckons a Zombie uprising would wipe us all out..


    My 8 cans of Stella and a Pen Knife will keep me alive.
  2. I did not know it was April Fools day!
  3. And these educated, talented people are NOT looking for i) a replacement for petrol, ii) a cure for cancer or iii) anything else, because....?
  4. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    This from this man?
    ssor Robert Smith? (the question mark is part of his surname and not a typographical mistake) and colleagues wrote: "We model a zombie attack using biological assumptions based on popular zombie movies.

    "We introduce a basic model for zombie infection and illustrate the outcome with numerical solutions."

    On his university web page, the mathematics professor at Ottawa University says the question mark distinguishes him from Robert Smith, lead singer of rock band The Cure.

    Why would he assume that people would think he was that Robert Smith, and not one of the other several million of same name?

    Anyway,I've seen 'Shaun of the dead' theree times . I know how to survibe a zombie attack.
  5. Auld-Yin

    Auld-Yin LE Reviewer Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    I thought that this was about the RLC until I got to this bit:

    Obviously it is impossible to get any life into the RLC 8)
  6. terroratthepicnic

    terroratthepicnic LE Reviewer Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Runners

    I suppose beating zombies would be based on how they come about. If it takes a bite or scratch to become a zombie, just don't go outside. But if it is caused by the same way that Stephen King describes in his book Cell, then we are pretty much doomed.
  7. It also depends on wether they shuffle about like mongs on a Sunshine Bus daytrip or if they sprint like they do in the new films.
  8. The bite & scratch zombies could be repelled by issuing units assigned to anti-zombie ops plate armour like a medieval knight, also battle-axes with really long handles would be useful for decapitation outside arms reach...
  9. Ze Germans though of this problem a long time ago!

  10. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    *Linky* Just a wild guess...
  11. BrunoNoMedals

    BrunoNoMedals LE Reviewer

    Guessing that link isn't remotely SFW?
  12. Precisely my thought when I saw it on the BBC website.

    Interestingly enough, the maths appear sound. Not so sure about the initial assumptions though!
  13. What is there? an Echo?

    I posted this two/three days ago in the NAAFI and got a yawn over the science geeks' results..sheesh.. ignoring colonials got the UJK into trouble a few years back IIRC..

    what> unless its reported by the BBC it isn't considered news??
  14. Zombies.......... I shite them! :evil: A good sword and let the beheading begin. :p

    For special areas there is always 'fuel-air', beautiful! :wink: