Army Rumour Service

Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

"You're a poo-poo head!"..."No, you're a poo-poo head" - Sticky for handbag swinging

Gescored!!!??? Bowlte???!!!!
Herr, wirf Hirn vom Himmel, that is ******* appalling German.
I hate to do that, but both words are in the Duden, the German Orthography and Grammar Nazis Holy Book.
I don't know since when or why they are considered as German but DaTurdBogs seems to be right twice a day, like a broken watch.
 
Were you even an Auditor in the financial services industry?

I ask as I worked at a well-known bank, and worked very closely with in-house Auditors for 18 months. Through no fault of their own, they knew virtually nothing of SARs, Market Abuse and the relevant regulations.

Being an Auditor doesn't really qualify you to comment above anyone else, so god knows why you're bringing it up.

Will you two just take it to the “Poo Poo” thread?

Oh...
 

Tyk

LE
Bugsy Botham.

Ich kann mich erinnern, als ich Anfang 1990 nach Cottbus zog. Die Uni dort hatte vier Mannschaften und eine davon erlaubte mir die Teilnahme. Ich war als zweiter Bowler dran, und die andere Mannschaft hatte mittlerweile 8 runs gescored. Ich bowlte 2 overs hintereinander und damit war die ganze Mannschaft "out", denn keiner kam mit meinen akkuraten 85 mph Yorkers zurecht. Wir gewannen indem wir danach einfach 12 runs hinlegten (wir spielten nur 1 Innings pro Mannschaft). Das war das kürzeste Spiel meines Lebens:)

After running it through the Bugsy's Original Arrse Special Translator (BOAST) we get:

I remember moving to Cottbus in early 1990. The university there had four teams and one of them allowed me to participate. I was the second bowler and the other team had scored eight runs by now. I bowled 2 overs in a row and so the whole team was "out" because no one could cope with my accurate 85 mph Yorkers. We won by just 12 runs (we played only 1 innings per team). This was the shortest game of my life:)

That's an interesting tale, quite apart from it being more or less not permitted for a bowler to bowl from each end consecutively (except by friendly agreement between the teams and the umpires), to win by 12 runs when the other team only had 8 scored and were toppled by yorkers (so clean bowled, no runs scored) in 12 balls.
That means the O'Bullshitter team batted first and ran up a whole 20 runs all out. Being charitable that Herr Flamingknackers bowled all 12 taking 10 wickets, that's maybe 2 sixes smashed off the other 2 so the max they scored was 20 giving his team the monstrous first innings of 32 runs.

What conclusions can we arrive at from this dit?

1. Bogbrush missed his calling and professional cricket missed out big time.
2. While a demon bowler, clearly he can't bat worth a tuppenny damn.
3. The dit is a complete fabrication and Bogsy is a lying, walting fantasist.
 
I hate to do that, but both words are in the Duden, the German Orthography and Grammar Nazis Holy Book.
I don't know since when or why they are considered as German but DaTurdBogs seems to be right twice a day, like a broken watch.
I stand corrected. I'm sure the Great Translator will wnak himself to a froth over my lack of knowledge. However, it just adds grist to the mill that your criticism of his German is fair and balanced. Is ,,Wichsfleck" in those August tomes, by any chance?

ETA: You just want to be "superior" to me, Wichsfleck!

Mit sozialischtem Grüß, Genosse!
 
That's an interesting tale, quite apart from it being more or less not permitted for a bowler to bowl from each end consecutively (except by friendly agreement between the teams and the umpires), to win by 12 runs when the other team only had 8 scored and were toppled by yorkers (so clean bowled, no runs scored) in 12 balls.
That means the O'Bullshitter team batted first and ran up a whole 20 runs all out. Being charitable that Herr Flamingknackers bowled all 12 taking 10 wickets, that's maybe 2 sixes smashed off the other 2 so the max they scored was 20 giving his team the monstrous first innings of 32 runs.

What conclusions can we arrive at from this dit?

1. Bogbrush missed his calling and professional cricket missed out big time.
2. While a demon bowler, clearly he can't bat worth a tuppenny damn.
3. The dit is a complete fabrication and Bogsy is a lying, walting fantasist.
You mean that Bugsy doesn't bowl from both ends of the crease? Revelation....
 

morsk

LE
months and months of


and repeat.
 
I stand corrected. I'm sure the Great Translator will wnak himself to a froth over my lack of knowledge. However, it just adds grist to the mill that your criticism of his German is fair and balanced. Is ,,Wichsfleck" in those August tomes, by any chance?

ETA: You just want to be "superior" to me, Wichsfleck!

Mit sozialischtem Grüß, Genosse!
No "Wichsfleck" is a more colloquial word and it describes a state like "Auf meiner Socke ist ein Wichsfleck", but it is no proper insult. Maybe between some naïve 7 year olds.

Für Frieden und Sozialismus - seid bereit!
(That'll make daddys little darling and cum dump shoot it's load in 2 seconds)
 

OneTenner

LE
Book Reviewer
Maybe a bag of the pure stuff made it possible
Ahhh... I understand now, the 'dirty' stuff is merely 'Columbian marching powder' the really pure stuff is 'Irish bowling (or running) powder'
 

NSP

LE
That's an interesting tale, quite apart from it being more or less not permitted for a bowler to bowl from each end consecutively (except by friendly agreement between the teams and the umpires), to win by 12 runs when the other team only had 8 scored and were toppled by yorkers (so clean bowled, no runs scored) in 12 balls.
That means the O'Bullshitter team batted first and ran up a whole 20 runs all out. Being charitable that Herr Flamingknackers bowled all 12 taking 10 wickets, that's maybe 2 sixes smashed off the other 2 so the max they scored was 20 giving his team the monstrous first innings of 32 runs.

What conclusions can we arrive at from this dit?

1. Bogbrush missed his calling and professional cricket missed out big time.
2. While a demon bowler, clearly he can't bat worth a tuppenny damn.
3. The dit is a complete fabrication and Bogsy is a lying, walting fantasist.
It's a shame that we no longer have Sluggy - being an actual cricket umpire was among her talents various, I believe.

Actually, it's a shame that we no longer have Sluggy full stop.
 

NSP

LE
ETA: You just want to be "superior" to me, Wichsfleck!
Isn't that the recently-announced new camo pattern the Bundeswehr are adopting?

Y'know - a replacement for Flecktarn...
 

OneTenner

LE
Book Reviewer
I hate to do that, but both words are in the Duden, the German Orthography and Grammar Nazis Holy Book.
I don't know since when or why they are considered as German but DaTurdBogs seems to be right twice a day, like a broken watch.
Maybe they entered the German language around 1945, with the sudden influx of English refugees spending their spare time (trying to) teach the Germans cricket? Just a thought...
 
Ahhh... I understand now, the 'dirty' stuff is merely 'Columbian marching powder' the really pure stuff is 'Irish bowling (or running) powder'

How else did he manage to make it Bagdad?
 
It's a shame that we no longer have Sluggy - being an actual cricket umpire was among her talents various, I believe.

Actually, it's a shame that we no longer have Sluggy full stop.

It's not far off a full year since she last logged onto Torn, a face slicing might not be appropriate but perhaps we could water a shoe in memory
 

NSP

LE
How much stems from teachers having limited means to keep discipline in schools, the teachers I know seem to find it challenging with the current generation of children
I'm not keen on turning this thread into yet another education diatribe.

Fill yer boots...
 

NSP

LE
It's not far off a full year since she last logged onto Torn, a face slicing might not be appropriate but perhaps we could water a shoe in memory
I think she lucked out in missing all this COVID wankspankery, though.

Wherever she is now, hopefully it's a better - and, crucially, much more fun - place than down here is.
 
I think she lucked out in missing all this COVID wankspankery, though.

Wherever she is now, hopefully it's a better - and, crucially, much more fun - place than down here is.
I don't think hell is a very fun place.
 
Maybe they entered the German language around 1945, with the sudden influx of English refugees spending their spare time (trying to) teach the Germans cricket? Just a thought...
Not that fast. They take their time until they put new words in and old words out. Sometimes it takes one or two decades.
 

OneTenner

LE
Book Reviewer

Latest Threads

Top