I was told about a potential Mrs 924 No3 by a colleague - same age, ex semi pro tennis player, just returning to the UK after several years teaching tennis in the Cannaries, brown shoulder length hair, 5' 2", good figure - would I be interested? What the hell, why not. Wheels in motion, bla bla, eventually colleague gives me her number so that I can introduce myself and see where we go from there. Eventually call her, sounds quite husky, intelligent and husky. She lives local, very local and has a Samoid dog. This is all too good. Working from home one day, I notice this absolute VOL walking her dog. The dog is a Samoid, and I know that there are not that many in the area. The walker is about 5'2", brown shoulder length hair, fit as fcuk figure (obviously, me thinks, from all that tennis) and is clad in norks hugging T-shirt, and mini skirt showing off tanned legs (obviously, ok you know where I am going). It must be her? I can't wait to call that evening and arrange an RV. Of course, I am too shrewd to ask her ' were you walking your dog today wearing......' as that would look as though I was spying! The RV is arranged for the following night, Friday, at one of my locals. The weather is great and therefore, maximum possibility of her needing to wear a mini skirt and a top without norks restrainers. I get in the shower, for the second time that day, and resist with all my might the need to knock one out, as I feel lucky, and need to keep as much man fat in my sacks in order to impress her later when the money shot is required. I get dressed, smiling, really looking forward to what is in store in three zero minutes. Tonight, is going to be great. I set off at a brisk pace that is, of course, perfected to see me arrive bang on 5 minutes before RV. She has informed me that she will be driving and that her car is a Ford Focus. 3 minutes past the hour, a Focus enters the pub car park and drive around the back to park. THIS IS IT!!!!! I wait, slobbering, grinning and the vision that will appear....... . . .. .. Click, clack of heels is heard and then she appears. A fcuking 5'2",size 14, legs on upside down, munter, who looks as though she has had too many nights on white litening and park benches...........FCUK! I still have to be polite so I by her a drink and look for a place where NO ONE will see me/us...... Sadly, there is nowhere that is totally isolated, therefore, there are couples around us, and all I want to do is write 'ARE WE FCUK A COUPLE' on me napper. I am apoplectic with despair that my illusions have been so cruelly been dashed. Needless to say, after two drinks (now that was going beyond the call of duty), I make my excuses and leave. Blind dates? there for cnuts!