Your first contact.

Discussion in 'The Training Wing' started by Tunstall91, Jan 19, 2012.

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  1. Hello,
    Can any vets and people who have just returned from a tour of duty as an infantryman post what their first real combat experience was, and how they felt?

    Before I get lots of negative comments telling me how its personal, horrible to ask or anything like that, if you dont like it, don't reply.

  2. Welcome to ARRSE, may your visit be a memorable one.
    • Like Like x 7
  3. Thank you :D
  4. If you work this correctly, you may be able to make a TV mini-series out of the replies. There's some really good production companies around nowadays!
  5. My first contact with a vet was about 6 months ago.

    It was a canine/motor vehicle interface that prompted me to attend, and as can be expected it was something of a traumatic experience. I cannot speak for my dog however, as she doesn't speak my language.

    On my arrival at his practice, I was apprehensive, but his soothing words and professional attitude soon put me at ease. He very quickly examined the pooch, and handed her over to one of his staff. (I think she was called Jane.) He then left me, in order to deal with an elderly lady who, obviously distraught, had entered the premises with a parrot in her handbag.

    It wasn't until 2 weeks later when I received his bill that the real trauma hit home. I was staggered at the amount of my hard earned cash he was demanding. I felt physically sick when I checked my (online) bank account and realised that with so little funds available, I'd have to go with the vets preferred monthly repayment option.

    Ive since disposed of my beloved doggy companion as I'm not going through that amount of pain again, I'll be telling you straight.

    That in itself put me into a mind altering, stress related grief fest, but I'll save you the agony of reading about it.

    Suffice to say, vets? I shit em.
    • Like Like x 11
  6. Tunstall, just who the F do you think you are giving orders on here? I refer specifically to your "if you don't like it, don't respond".

    You may not realise it but I was a Corporal in Her Majesties Royal Engineers. As such I don't take orders from the great unwashed and certainly not from stray journo's.

    Are you the journo who stuck his head in the back of a truck and asked the squaddies in there if they were with the bomb squad and received the response "Nah mate we're with the Woolwich?" If so, your subsequent article in the London press about the bomb squad from Woolwich was highly imaginative - one hesitates to use the words a tissue of lies.

    Like Arti et Al, we who have suffered greatly for our Queen and country do not bear our breasts in public and prefer to share our most traumatic times with our anger management counsellors, or a sympathetic bird with big knockers.

    Probably my most traumatic moment was realising that I was going to have to get Biblical with a female (I use the term loosely) called "Socks" from the Snake Pit in Hohne.

    The full horror of my predicament did not hit me fully until I witnessed her writhing out of her shattered grey, underwear with unmentionable stains of various colours.

    That night was long. I thought it would never end.

    I still wake up screaming at the memory of it all.
    • Like Like x 2
  7. Hello there!

    Thank you for your interest in the psychological welfare of returned soldiers.

    I recommend that you ask in this establishment that I beleive is close o your home:

    Rainford Ex-Servicemens Club
    Cross Pit Lane
    Rainford St Helens
    Merseyside WA11 8AJ United Kingdom.
    Ph: +44.01744-882795

    I further recommend you wear white trainers and a badge saying "Kingo's are lazy, thieving chappies"

    You can tell them I sent you.

    Do let us know how you get on.
    • Like Like x 2
  8. Schaden

    Schaden LE Book Reviewer

    One has to wonder what the mongs first post was.
  9. I think the op's first contact may have been with little green men and a BFO **** probe.
  10. My first experience with Combat must have been in the early 1990s when I started learning Tae Kwon Do at school. I don't remember which issue number it was but I remember being initially impressed by all those fighting types and hoping that I too, one day, would have a black belt. Sadly, as I got older, I realised that it was really just a magazine for ninja walts and stopped reading it
  11. Try emailing James Herriot. He's a Vet, and a writer as well, and if he replies, his experiences will no doubt be clearly written, concise, well structured and will lack the grammatical and spelling disasters often found littered around this site.

    Win win situation for you there, and to help you get started, I can confirm that the owners of Wikipedia, have collected up all their toys and put them back in the pram.

    James Herriot - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
  12. My first contact.....remember it well, it was a little fella with short legs and long arms who just wanted to phone home...I just had to finish him.
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  13. My first experience with Combat was with the simulator during my Bowman Advanced Signaller course. Although I enjoy moving the little tanks around and sending Arnie quotes as orders, I realised there and then that the chances of ever making it work properly were fairly slim and then experienced a rush of terror when I realised that, as a Royal Signals technician, I was going to spend the rest of my career answering stupid questions about this system and why it's not working properly posed by Staff Officers who clearly don't really understand how digital and analogue signals work never mind a complex radio system like Bowman or applications like Combat.
  14. My first contact was shaking the hand of a Bosnian Serb General, a large florid bloke with a lot of cheap aftershave. I passed him a well skiffed mug of "home made baileys" coffee. Unfortunately the local Turps we used to make the "Baileys" was a bit iffy, I started hallucinating and my arse fell off.

    They returned fire on our check point that very evening.

    Since then I've been awaiting a summons from the Haig courts for poisoning.
    • Like Like x 3