You May Be a Taliban If..

Discussion in 'The Lamp and Sandbag II - The Tall Story Strikes B' started by tomahawk6, Mar 13, 2008.

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  1. You may be a Taliban if...

    1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

    2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

    3. You have more wives than teeth.

    4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon "unclean."

    5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

    6. You can't think of anyone you HAVEN'T declared Jihad against.

    7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

    8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

    9. You've ever uttered the phrase, "I love what you've done with your cave."

    10. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.

    11. You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.

    12. You've ever had a crush on your neighbor's goat.
  2. 13. You post a thread called 'You may be a Taliban if...' for the eighteenth time in a week.
  3. Borderline racist, which would be alright if it were also funny... 3/10
  4. Fuck off you soft cunt. Its mildly amusing at best admittedly, but who appointed you a comedy critic?
  5. Hum, fair enough, I suppose that wasn't a very helpful thing to say. Sorry!
  6. Dealing with Muslim Terrorists

    As we all know Muslims consider it a sin for a man to see a naked woman who is not his wife.

    So this Sunday at 2:00 pm all women are asked to leave their houses naked to help weed out any terrorists. Walking round their housing estates for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.

    All men are to sit in deck chairs or sun loungers outside on the pavement to prove they’re not Muslim.

    This will also show support for the ladies.

    Since Muslims also don’t approve of alcohol a cold six pack by your side will be further proof of your anti-terrorist sentiment.

    Your efforts to root out terrorism and your participation in this anti-terrorist exercise is most appreciated.
  7. no its not, get back to the guardian forum.
  8. I think the suggestion (which i can't bothered to verify) was that Tomahawk has a history of posting anti-Muslim rants disguised at humour. I don't know if it could be categorised as racist really (referring to a religious tribe, not a race), but it was as funny as an episode of Eastenders.