You know you're a Taliban if...

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#1
You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

You own a 3000 quid machine gun and 5000 quid rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

You have more wives than teeth.

You wipe your arse with your bare left hand, but consider bacon 'unclean.'

You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

You can't think of anyone you HAVEN'T declared Jihad against.

You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

You've often uttered the phrase, 'I love what you've done with your cave.'

You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.

You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.

You've ever had a crush on your neighbor's goat.
 
#5
Thinking of Thursday gives you a hard on.
 
#8
You know you're Taliban when... you have continued the family tradition (going back generations) of humiliating the British Army in battle
Goat banging.com is that >>> way, you must have got lost.

Maybe that explains your lying posts though?
 
#9
You know you're Taliban when... you have continued the family tradition (going back generations) of humiliating the British Army in battle
And ignore is now engaged you dullard.
 
#10
You know you're Taliban when... you have continued the family tradition (going back generations) of humiliating the British Army in battle
Could you point out these Humiliations (aside from the embarrassment of the whole Khyber pass disaster) of course if you are in youre own unique manner defining a defeat as a humiliation, or less than 100% victory as a humiliation or Political failures as a military humiliation then not only are you engaging in your normal dullardry you also need to consider all those Humiliations the Taleban / Afghanistanis have suffered as well.

Still at least Spider may avoid the site penis 2016 award
 
#11
Could you point out these Humiliations (aside from the embarrassment of the whole Khyber pass disaster) of course if you are in youre own unique manner defining a defeat as a humiliation, or less than 100% victory as a humiliation or Political failures as a military humiliation then not only are you engaging in your normal dullardry you also need to consider all those Humiliations the Taleban / Afghanistanis have suffered as well.

Still at least Spider may avoid the site penis 2016 award
Goodness me...you take me to task for posting on the jokes page...you're a positive laugh a minute, you are...
 

No.4 Mk.1

On ROPS
On ROPs
#13
It was 15 heavily armed Taliban wandering round Bastion Airfield, slotting a couple of septics, having 8 Harrier cremations and sending flames 100m into the sky when they torched the fuel stores that swung it for me personally.

My humiliation was not that the Taliban were so audacious - my humiliation was that the raid was the most easily preventable attack eva, but i was serving with an army who really didn't seem to give a fcuk or have a clue. I did 6 months mostly in Bastion but also 5 CLPs that i fucking loved, and yet the only time i was truly scared, terrified, was in an airfield guard tower the week before the raid. I saw how wide open, vulnerable and 'don't give a fuck' we were and I tried to raise concerns, but could not find anyone actually gave a fuck.

The Government report into the attack is a fucking whitewash too - all those responsible had tea, biscuits, promotions, gongs and brass bands before anyone even looked at the report.

10 seconds after the ammo dump went up i was in my tent donning body drama, etc ready to jump on to a truck to the airfield or just save our arrses from secondary attackers. In the time it had taken me to get battle ready the Corporals who'd i'd heard the first shots with were still finishing their ciggies in the smoke area and the greatest other reaction from other junior ranks was to grab their cameras and stand on the Hesco in t-shirts trying to film the battle that was just a few minutes old.

The British Army humiliated itself that night, and that ladies and gentlemen is a fact. Afghans will be telling their children that legend in 100 years, as the US Marine Corp probably will too.
 
#14
It was 15 heavily armed Taliban wandering round Bastion Airfield, slotting a couple of septics, having 8 Harrier cremations and sending flames 100m into the sky when they torched the fuel stores that swung it for me personally.

My humiliation was not that the Taliban were so audacious - my humiliation was that the raid was the most easily preventable attack eva, but i was serving with an army who really didn't seem to give a fcuk or have a clue. I did 6 months mostly in Bastion but also 5 CLPs that i ******* loved, and yet the only time i was truly scared, terrified, was in an airfield guard tower the week before the raid. I saw how wide open, vulnerable and 'don't give a ****' we were and I tried to raise concerns, but could not find anyone actually gave a ****.

The Government report into the attack is a ******* whitewash too - all those responsible had tea, biscuits, promotions, gongs and brass bands before anyone even looked at the report.

10 seconds after the ammo dump went up i was in my tent donning body drama, etc ready to jump on to a truck to the airfield or just save our arrses from secondary attackers. In the time it had taken me to get battle ready the Corporals who'd i'd heard the first shots with were still finishing their ciggies in the smoke area and the greatest other reaction from other junior ranks was to grab their cameras and stand on the Hesco in t-shirts trying to film the battle that was just a few minutes old.

The British Army humiliated itself that night, and that ladies and gentlemen is a fact. Afghans will be telling their children that legend in 100 years, as the US Marine Corp probably will too.
That is gobsmackingly sad, wrong, words fail me..........
 
#15
It was 15 heavily armed Taliban wandering round Bastion Airfield, slotting a couple of septics, having 8 Harrier cremations and sending flames 100m into the sky when they torched the fuel stores that swung it for me personally.

My humiliation was not that the Taliban were so audacious - my humiliation was that the raid was the most easily preventable attack eva, but i was serving with an army who really didn't seem to give a fcuk. I did 6 months mostly in Bastion but also 5 CLPs that i ******* loved, and yet the only time i was truly scared, terrified, was in an airfield guard tower the week before the raid. I saw how wide open, vulnerable and 'don't give a ****' we were and I tried to raise concerns, but could not find anyone actually gave a ****.

The Government report into the attack is a ******* whitewash too - all those responsible had tea, biscuits, promotions, gongs and brass bands before anyone even looked at the report.

10 seconds after the ammo dump went up i was in my tent donning body drama, etc ready to jump on to a truck to the airfield or just save our arrses from secondary attackers. In the time it had taken me to get battle ready the Corporals who'd i'd heard the first shots with were still finishing their ciggies in the smoke area and the greatest other reaction from other junior ranks was to grab their cameras and stand on the Hesco in t-shirts trying to film the battle that was just a few minutes old.

The British Army humiliated itself that night, and that ladies and gentlemen is a fact. Afghans will be telling their children that legend in 100 years, as the US Marine Corp probably will too.
So a failure by a few becomes a failure by all.

As to the rest Those that stayed put or grabbed cameras that you are condemning for not running blindly towards the gunfire and potentially across another units line of fire, happen they were doing as ordered and were not simply uncaring or the idiots it suits you to believe they are.

Not being there I wouldn't know, but perceptions and facts aren't always in tune

Edit but allowing for that that's 2 hardly repeatedly or traditional.
 
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#16
That is gobsmackingly sad, wrong, words fail me..........
No its not its his opinion and its supported by a few others with a sad on with the army, therefore any thing that disagrees with him is a cover up or whitewash.

If you don't agree with that version of events you are a sheep brainwashed by propaganda. (in general I don't think No4 has ever advanced that argument himself - others have
 
#18
It was 15 heavily armed Taliban wandering round Bastion Airfield, slotting a couple of septics, having 8 Harrier cremations and sending flames 100m into the sky when they torched the fuel stores that swung it for me personally.

My humiliation was not that the Taliban were so audacious - my humiliation was that the raid was the most easily preventable attack eva, but i was serving with an army who really didn't seem to give a fcuk or have a clue. I did 6 months mostly in Bastion but also 5 CLPs that i ******* loved, and yet the only time i was truly scared, terrified, was in an airfield guard tower the week before the raid. I saw how wide open, vulnerable and 'don't give a ****' we were and I tried to raise concerns, but could not find anyone actually gave a ****.

The Government report into the attack is a ******* whitewash too - all those responsible had tea, biscuits, promotions, gongs and brass bands before anyone even looked at the report.

10 seconds after the ammo dump went up i was in my tent donning body drama, etc ready to jump on to a truck to the airfield or just save our arrses from secondary attackers. In the time it had taken me to get battle ready the Corporals who'd i'd heard the first shots with were still finishing their ciggies in the smoke area and the greatest other reaction from other junior ranks was to grab their cameras and stand on the Hesco in t-shirts trying to film the battle that was just a few minutes old.

The British Army humiliated itself that night, and that ladies and gentlemen is a fact. Afghans will be telling their children that legend in 100 years, as the US Marine Corp probably will too.
When you have a small scale attack, it's best to let the guard and QR force deal with it. The last thing needed is thousands of tooled up blokes in various states of dress wading in and brassing each other up.

Therego you are a mong.
 
#19
Sarcasm aside - I did mean what I said its your perception and interpretation of events - You may also be entirely correct as regards that incident - My point stands though you are judging several thousand people by the lapses of a few in one place and arguably a place that encouraged such lapses.

I would be equally critical - if you were calling all soldiers baby killers or all Muslims terrorists or all Pakistanis rapists - Its the stereotyping im objecting to, it isn't so much the subject matter.

Although @Pebbles has just confirmed what common sense suggested.
 
#20
No its not its his opinion and its supported by a few others with a sad on with the army, therefore any thing that disagrees with him is a cover up or whitewash.

If you don't agree with that version of events you are a sheep brainwashed by propaganda. (in general I don't think No4 has ever advanced that argument himself - others have
You have problems with vernacular English, don't you ? My meaning was 'How shameful that such a thing was allowed to happen'. Having said that, I tend to agree in part with Pebbles....but there is a difference between being combat ready and standing back in anticipation and lounging around as if witnessing a scuffle in a shopping mall, which is what No4 Mk1 seemed to have witnessed.
 
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