You know you re (Ex) Army when....................

A

Aleegee1698

Guest
#1
Dunno if this has been done on here before, but it always seems to generate a few laughs, all the aspects of Squaddy life, the slang, mentality etc, that you can never ever get out of your system, i.e how long it took you after de-kitting to stop bulling shoes, hard-targetting down to the corner shop, forcing your kids to make Bed-blocks, or giving name, rank and number whilst cashing a cheque at the bank etc.

You know youre (Ex) Army when.........................
 
#5
Dunno if this has been done on here before, but it always seems to generate a few laughs, all the aspects of Squaddy life, the slang, mentality etc, that you can never ever get out of your system, i.e how long it took you after de-kitting to stop bulling shoes, hard-targetting down to the corner shop, forcing your kids to make Bed-blocks, or giving name, rank and number whilst cashing a cheque at the bank etc.

You know youre (Ex) Army when.........................
Your location is the "mog".

Please die immediately. Prat.
 
#15
...................you realise it's perfectly possible to be patriotic and still vote Labour.

...................you realise civvy jobs are just as worthwhile.

...................you look out the window before you decide what to wear rather than at Part 2 orders to see what someone else says you are allowed to wear.

..................when you no longer have a couple of stripes to compensate for your lack of intelligence.
 
#16
You know your ex-army when you cannot find your tin of Blanco, brush and '38 Patern Webbing....

When you wake up in the morning and there are no dozens of geezer getting out of bed to go to the ablutions for shite, shower and shave... you wake up and realise that the only person(s) in the bed is yourself, or yourself and your Doris....

Your ex-Squaddy when you get up in the morning, half asleep, step outside your front door buck naked, scratching your bollox and yawning wondering where you were the night before... and realising that you are no longer in the army when you get funny looks from the folks standing at the Bus stop just outside your front door....

When you no longer have to queue up in the Paymasters Office with your Army form AB64 Part 2 to collect your pay...... you realise that the AF64 Part 2 was phased out way back in 1970 or so....

When after a night on beer and electric soup, you get up in a befuddled state and go and piss in what you think is the next soldiers locker.... and the Doris screeches... ""What the f*ck to you think your doing....??" you come to and and realise your pissing in the Doris's clothes wardrobe......

When at home in the evening... the phone rings and wakes you from a slumber in front of the telly, you answer and it's a Double Glazing salesman trying to sell you stuff.... you respond in a tic-tock smart military fashion and shout into the phone..."I'm standing to attentions Sir,..... Sir, I am now saluting you.....!" then you realise that you have been ex-army for the past 35 years.......!!!
 
K

Kirkz

Guest
#17
When you read through shite threads like this on arrse and realize that's 10 minutes of your life you're never going to get back ffs!!!
 
#18
Your ex-Squaddy when you get up in the morning, half asleep, step outside your front door buck naked, scratching your bollox and yawning wondering where you were the night before... and realising that you are no longer in the army when you get funny looks from the folks standing at the Bus stop just outside your front door....
Cracked me up !! It's been a long time since I stumbled outside the spider and did the same and realised it was already time for first works...... 7 days ROP's March out!!
 

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