You know you are getting old when...

Bugger diabetes, chances are I'll be dead by 50 by misadventure.
Ha! You should be so lucky. Didn't think I'd make 30. Gave the cunt plenty of opportunities to kill me and still aten't ded at close to twice that.

I think I may be bulletproof.
 
Ha! You should be so lucky. Didn't think I'd make 30. Gave the cunt plenty of opportunities to kill me and still aten't ded at close to twice that.

I think I may be bulletproof.
It's been proven I am not bulletproof, but still somehow manage to kick the cunt's cunt in every time he gives it a go...
 
Ja, what's that all about? Seems the bastard isn't even trying...
 
Hands up who think it’s a good idea to grab a pic, me I was happy to walk away with some dignity.
Dignity is overrated. Shitting yourself and wiping it on the manager's shirt is way funnier.
 
Ha! You should be so lucky. Didn't think I'd make 30. Gave the cunt plenty of opportunities to kill me and still aten't ded at close to twice that.

I think I may be bulletproof.
Now you've gone and jinxed yourself, or at the very least tempted the Emperor (PBUH).
 
Not so much as "you know you're getting old" but wondering why the hell I've bothered.

Now, I can understand the need for my TV to connect so I can watch Amazon Prime, I can change channels by talking to the remote which I've connected. I've connected to my soundbar and can now increase or decrease the volume remotely (which I could do with the remote control anyway).

The Samsung washing machine can be switched on and off and the settings changed by the phone (still won't load the bloody machine though).

I don't have one but my neighbour has one of them Alexa do this thingies. Not sure I'm into that yet but I can, even at my advance age, understand it might be useful.

I have my boarding passes on the phone or tablet which is quite handy as I keep misplacing things (shame I can't have my passport on the thing - old joke - I wish I'd brought the chopping board from the kitchen with us. "Don't worry, I'm sure the flat we've rented will have one", Yeah, but that one won't have the passports on top).

Loads of things around the house I can operate such as turning on the aircon by my phone so the place is nice and warm or cool (depending on the season) when I get home.

Yeah, yeah, I can understand all this could be useful even though it tends to make you bloody lazy (I'm of the age when we actually had to stand up and press a button on the telly to change channels and laughed at those lazy Americans who did it remotely). But, yes, I do understand them, especially as we now have more than 3 channels.

What I can't understand, nor see the reason, or think of anyway at all it would be useful is that my bloody toothbrush connects to an app on the phone or my tablet. Why, why in God's holy name would I need to connect my bloody toothbrush to a computer program?

Just waiting for my trusty old Gillette razor to start singing to me when I'm shaving (go on, I'm sure someone will say you can already do that).
 
I think 35 is almost like a threshold for when you slowly start to realize you're not that young anymore.

My hair is falling out - so it means I will be bald by 50, if not earlier.

And not wanting to converse with under 25s....they are mostly just air heads.
 
I think 35 is almost like a threshold for when you slowly start to realize you're not that young anymore.

My hair is falling out - so it means I will be bald by 50, if not earlier.

And not wanting to converse with under 25s....they are mostly just air heads.

pot .kettle. black................... P.S, where are you at the moment? what country, continent, island, country, town, a small clue is all that is needed, we would really all like to know.
 
. . . And not wanting to converse with under 25s....they are mostly just air heads.
"Under 25s" seems to characterise the only (at least majority of . . . ), "talking-heads" that inhabit my TV screen !! :( .
 
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I'm closer to 50 these days.
I really am a grumpy old bastard, I keep telling people that I don't have anger issues.

I just have a VERY low fuckwit tolerance level.
 
pot .kettle. black................... P.S, where are you at the moment? what country, continent, island, country, town, a small clue is all that is needed, we would really all like to know.
According to a lot a people on the site, in a bed sit in Tower Hamlets.
 

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