A guy goes into the butchers and asks for a fresh Norfolk turkey. The assistant produces a nice bird and the guy sticks his finger up it's rear, smells it and says. "This is NOT a Norfolk bird, it must be a Norfolk turkey." The assistant apologises and gets another. Same routine, finger..smell..not from Norfolk. The assistant tries twice more with the same result as the turkeys are all sold without wrapping, hanging in the traditional way. The fifth time, the guy says. "At last! a fresh Norfolk turkey, about time..you must be new here, where do you come from?" The pissed off assistant drops his pants, turns his arse to the guy and says. "You're the f****n' expert..you tell me!"