WuFlu - Anti Vaxxers

[Anonymous Yank]

And you never got the autism?
Better check yourself carefully for the mark of the beast.

I have the full set of Asperger's.

My first Measles vaccination was the original Edmonston B strain... probably what gave me measles.

 

[morsk]

Two old guys, Bugsy and BB, wanted to go for a drink at the pub, but only had a pound between them.
Bugsy says, "I know what to do, gimme your bit o' coin, and I'll take care of it."
BB hands over his pence and Bugsy pops into the butcher, returning with a large sausage.
BB, quite upset, says, "Now what'll we do for drink? And why have you spent all that money on that bloody sausage?"
"Old trick I learned on my travels, mate," says Bugsy, "I'll just tuck the sausage in my trousers, and we go in and drink till they ask us to pay, I pull it out and you just go mad on the sausage till the bartender kicks us out. No problem."
Thinking about all that free drink BB agrees readily. After a few pints the bartender decides this decrepit pair might not have enough money for the tab so asks them to pay up, at which point they put the plan into action. Sure enough, the bartender kicks them out straightaway, forgetting to collect the tab in his state of shock. Still feeling the need for drink, the pair continue this a few more times, laughing their way through their free pub crawl. After their fifth or sixth go, BB is feeling a bit hungry and asks Bugsy for a bit of the sausage, as he may be getting a bit faint from no food. Of course, Bugsy could only reply, "Sorry BB, Imagine how bad it is for me, I lost the sausage back at that second pub."

As with all american humour, I saw that punchline at the word sausage. Well done for bothering to type that shite out though

 

[Anonymous Yank]

As with all american humour, I saw that punchline at the word sausage. Well done for bothering to type that shite out though

I was going to stop after the first sentence since it is a rather old joke from the North lands. However, this IS ArRSe...

 

[Grownup_Rafbrat]

I was going to stop after the first sentence since it is a rather old joke from the North lands. However, this IS ArRSe...

When you say joke, is it meant to be funny then?

 

[Charlie4]

Two old guys, Bugsy and BB, wanted to go for a drink at the pub, but only had a pound between them.
Bugsy says, "I know what to do, gimme your bit o' coin, and I'll take care of it."
BB hands over his pence and Bugsy pops into the butcher, returning with a large sausage.
BB, quite upset, says, "Now what'll we do for drink? And why have you spent all that money on that bloody sausage?"
"Old trick I learned on my travels, mate," says Bugsy, "I'll just tuck the sausage in my trousers, and we go in and drink till they ask us to pay, I pull it out and you just go mad on the sausage till the bartender kicks us out. No problem."
Thinking about all that free drink BB agrees readily. After a few pints the bartender decides this decrepit pair might not have enough money for the tab so asks them to pay up, at which point they put the plan into action. Sure enough, the bartender kicks them out straightaway, forgetting to collect the tab in his state of shock. Still feeling the need for drink, the pair continue this a few more times, laughing their way through their free pub crawl. After their fifth or sixth go, BB is feeling a bit hungry and asks Bugsy for a bit of the sausage, as he may be getting a bit faint from no food. Of course, Bugsy could only reply, "Sorry BB, Imagine how bad it is for me, I lost the sausage back at that second pub."

Are you lost mate?

https://www.arrse.co.uk/community/threads/straightforward-crap-jokes-the-ill-get-me-coat-collection.289335/

 

[retread2]

Me too, and Anthrax

Now I'm jealous.

 

[morsk]

Now I'm jealous.

I tell you.

The nurse said "we only really give this to people on high readiness and CBRN personnel". I told her my Regt is High readiness and I AM a CBRNI. "Then tell me what CBRN stands for". Really? THATS your test to see if I am telling the truth, IoT get a vaccination that makes everyone sick as a dog. Well done love. I suffered NO side effects.

 

[Unremarkable]

So as Wuflu has now killed hundreds of thousands of people throughout the world - and scientists are working on a vaccine, will you get vaccinated?

Personally I'm of the belief that things like this are very common in nature and have been since time began. It's natures way of keeping animals/plants etc in check & wiping out the weaker members of the species.
Also usually when you get something, your body builds up a resistance to whatever you got - then passes that to your offspring. Also if a newer strain/variant of the xxx disease/virus comes along & you already have some sort of resistance - then your body can deal with it better.

Vaccines & all drugs in particular often have side affects (look at thalidomide for example), and many have been recalled due to those effects causing harm to people. So my own choice would be to not get vaccinated and to let nature take it's course - but that's just my own personal opinion.

I've made a poll so I can see how others think - will you get the vaccine or not ? (when and if it ever gets made).

Pol Pot Walt.

 

[Goatman]

May I refer the Hon Member (and I use the term advisedly) for Loose Chippings to the answer previously given in Hansard: https://www.arrse.co.uk/community/threads/covid-vaccine-guinea-pigs.302638/post-10401336

 

[Dan Gleebles]

Natural remedies available too
View attachment 477750

RAF Regt are squared away, then.

 

[Whey_Aye_Banzai]

It's natures way of keeping animals/plants etc in check & wiping out the weaker members of the species.

Bees are part of nature, because nature produces them, and beehives are perfectly natural because bees produce them.

Humans are part of nature, because nature produces humans, and vaccines are perfectly natural because humans produce them.

Other perfectly natural stuff are big cities, human pollution, atom bombs, world wars and Sunderland football club.

Maybe not Sunderland football club.

 

[mrdude]

Bees are part of nature, because nature produces them, and beehives are perfectly natural because bees produce them.

Humans are part of nature, because nature produces humans, and vaccines are perfectly natural because humans produce them.

Other perfectly natural stuff are big cities, human pollution, atom bombs, world wars and Sunderland football club.

Maybe not Sunderland football club.

You forgot gingers - and they are the spawn of the devil and have no souls.....I don't think nature invented them - I blame the aliens for crossing some speckled frog spawn with an orangutan.

 

[Unremarkable]

Bees are part of nature, because nature produces them, and beehives are perfectly natural because bees produce them.

Humans are part of nature, because nature produces humans, and vaccines are perfectly natural because humans produce them.

Other perfectly natural stuff are big cities, human pollution, atom bombs, world wars and Sunderland football club.

Maybe not Sunderland football club.

Yes. I have seen pointing out that Humans are part of nature, and therefore so are our errors and shortcomings, referred to as a "sixth form argument" some years ago in the press.
I take the middle ground: the disastrous consequences of Human action are indeed manifestations of Human nature, but we do have (conditional) free will; we can learn, we can improve on our nature. Temper our natural drives until they change. While we can!

 

[Sam The Bam]

 

[bob_the_bomb]

You forgot gingers - and they are the spawn of the devil and have no souls.....I don't think nature invented them - I blame the aliens for crossing some speckled frog spawn with an orangutan.

FINALLY you say something that makes sense...

 

[happyuk]

So as Wuflu has now killed hundreds of thousands of people throughout the world - and scientists are working on a vaccine, will you get vaccinated?

Nope. I will never take a potential Covid vaccine. I have thought long and hard about this and enforced vaccinations is my line in the sand.

There are plenty of signs that we may be over optimistic in thinking we can take politicians at their word for what they plan. A "Great Reset" is a nice millennial friendly term for communism, they can sell politically into the self destruction malaise. The reality here in the UK is that our National Health Service has ceased to exist as little more than a COVID centric enforcement bureaucracy. Ironically, they wouldn't even have to change the big splash letters if they renamed it the National Hospice Service.

Ask if the vaccine has MRC-5 in it (they all do, these are aborted foetal cells and other DNA)
Also ask if there is a possibility of a "latrogenic reaction" (an adverse reaction caused by multiple compounds or drugs interacting with each other) from the vaccine (again, they all do).

When the doctor says, "Yes" to these questions I guess there is nothing to stop us thanking him and walking away. My concern is that it may not be not be carried out by Hippocratic-oath-sworn doctors with a basic respect for people's beliefs. Without choice you don't have a country you have a tyranny.

 

[Civvy Scum]

Some don't want to be vaccinated? Fine, the rest of us get it a bit earlier. Suits me.

 

[FORMER_FYRDMAN]

I'm not getting vaccinated simply because someone's going to have to kill the zombies.

 

[Whey_Aye_Banzai]

You forgot gingers - and they are the spawn of the devil and have no souls.....I don't think nature invented them - I blame the aliens for crossing some speckled frog spawn with an orangutan.

Nature is self-correcting:

Gingers face extinction due to climate change, scientists warn

Gene is thought to be a response to cloudy weather

www.independent.co.uk

It rids itself of it's mistakes.

 

[theoriginalphantom]

When you say joke, is it meant to be funny then?

it was faintly amusing in the 90's when I first heard it.

I expect it's much older than that