Here's the thing.... A pal of mine got me thinking about GOLF. She's been dripping about her bloke buggering off to some foreign land (France I think, God help him) to play golf. Now, she's a bit of a catch this chick (tall, essence, bit mardy - ticks every box, as it were) and this bell-end is playing GOLF instead of swooping in her, ahem, undercroft. Why would anyone do that? Moto GP, Rugby World Cup, Man U at home to Chelsea.... Yes, yes, and ok go on then. But feckin' golf??????? What kind of beefer would do that? Now... I'm a reasonably intelligent sort, concentrated at school, listened to my Mum, that sort of thing, and I'll try anything once (apart from the "act" suggested by a Russian whore in Sochi involving my back-doors, a pound of butter and the big black fake rubber cock, that was just wrong). But I just DO NOT GET GOLF. Here's why: apart from it NOT being a sport or remotely looking like fun, or having any sort of humour attached to it, or involving lycra-pit-girls, or having a moderate amout of violence or the propensity for comic injuries, like bull-fighting does (antler up the bum, now THAT's funny!), or any kind of fitness involved, IT'S JUST SHYTE. But lots of reasonably intelligent folk seem to do it. Fecks sake, the Seniors' Mess is virtually run from a golf course, you can't find a WO2 on a Wednesday afternoon unless you're surrounded by grass, trees and blokes dressed as '70's pimps. Somebody help me out here... WTF is the appeal of golf that grown heterosexual men pass up a bit of the good stuff to knock a ball around a field? The opinions of fellow arrsers would be welcomed. Edited to add: before anyone reminds me, yes I have seen the grumble vid "18 Holes", but I'm not taking account of that as I don't hink it was a documentary.