"WTF? I never would have expected to hear that" and other stories that have shocked you.

A Stud would never have allowed anyone to touch him there. Dipshit would have been killed by hoove strikes.
Aye, but what a way to go. If there's a bar in the afterlife, what better bragging rights than having a headstone that read; "Hoofed to death whilst bumming a stallion..." ...I'd buy him a pint for ingenuity!
 
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I would imagine the horse was below tha age of consent.....

Speaking of things I didn't expect
Defending a bloke shagging a horse on the grounds that it didn't say No probably qualifies!
Not defending but merely observing the facts my friend.
 
But why do people seem to enjoy crapping in odd places? When I was at school I looked in one of the cupboards in the Home Economics classroom to get something, and was appalled to find a turd in a kettle. Why? Just why?
Have to admit there is an enjoyable relish of the adrenalin rush after leaning against a tree and curling one off in a tesco bag then leaving the bag for some unsuspecting soul to discover. I blame it on compo, a yellow handbag and Soltau.
 
OK, it's 02:23 and I've just read the whole thread. Very informative and has dragged up a load of personal stuff. At the moment, I'm waiting for queries with a Coroners Service and a FOI request to turn up with some answers about an uncle who died in prison. I've known about the death but no details as yet. This may lead to the mystery of who one of my granddads was, because he is curiously absent from all death certs of my parents' generation. There may be more than one father to various aunts and uncles and I know for certain, dead uncle was only half brother to my mum and possibly aunts. I know I'm about to hear unexpected stuff and how shocking that will be is dependent on who grandad was. More digging if I actually get a name. It seems they previous generation were sworn to secrecy about him, but the lack of Father's Name on documents and granny keeping her maiden name gives the game away. The only question now is who was he? Definitely a soldier in the first war. I'll post more when I know more
 

CharleyBourne

War Hero
Book Reviewer
Not sure what made me think of this, but I was minding my own business one afternoon in a nearby city when I noticed an old lady with a Zimmer frame crossing the road. She paused as she stopped for breath. For some reason she asked if she knew me, and seemed to think that I had previously lived there - nope. She than said she had been a 'working girl'. She went on her way, possibly as I expressed no interest in 'business'.

Just what the f***?
Pics?
 

Yokel

LE
Have to admit there is an enjoyable relish of the adrenalin rush after leaning against a tree and curling one off in a tesco bag then leaving the bag for some unsuspecting soul to discover. I blame it on compo, a yellow handbag and Soltau.

So it is you?

At school the Geography teacher told us a story about a relative in the 1900s. He had to empty the local privy but forgot and went to the pub instead Eventually he remembered, and went and removed the bucket, put it in a sack, and started walking towards his allotment.

He was walking with this sack over his shoulder when he was stopped by a Policeman who asked what was in the sack.
.
"Shit" was the honest reply.

The Policeman thought that he was swearing .as he had been caught with stolen stuff, and nicked him.The Sergeant at the station demanded that the contents of the sack be emptied on to the desk...
 

holyphuc

Old-Salt
Aye, but what a way to go. If there's a bar in the afterlife, what better bragging rights than having a headstone that read; "Hoofed to death whilst bumming a stallion..." ...I'd buy him a pint for ingenuity!
Talking to a vet years ago he said if he was doing anything that involved the rear end of a horse he would make sure there was a sturdy barrier between him and their hooves, whereas with cows he was happy to work without one, which obviously means cows are slags and enjoy someone rooting around in their nether regions.
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
So it is you?

At school the Geography teacher told us a story about a relative in the 1900s. He had to empty the local privy but forgot and went to the pub instead Eventually he remembered, and went and removed the bucket, put it in a sack, and started walking towards his allotment.

He was walking with this sack over his shoulder when he was stopped by a Policeman who asked what was in the sack.
.
"Shit" was the honest reply.

The Policeman thought that he was swearing .as he had been caught with stolen stuff, and nicked him.The Sergeant at the station demanded that the contents of the sack be emptied on to the desk...

Remember watching the dung carriers in Nepal. Not unsurprisingly, one of the lowest castes.
Animal and human waste.

Carried on their backs.

In a hessian sack, so the liquid contents would leak out, dribbling down their backs and legs.
 
Remember watching the dung carriers in Nepal. Not unsurprisingly, one of the lowest castes.
Animal and human waste.

Carried on their backs.

In a hessian sack, so the liquid contents would leak out, dribbling down their backs and legs.
You can see that any weekend at 0300hrs on a Saturday morning in Manchester , Leeds, Liverpool Etc at chucking out time, the pissed up tarts and mongs do a great impersonation of the Nepal dung carriers. :p
 
Talking to a vet years ago he said if he was doing anything that involved the rear end of a horse he would make sure there was a sturdy barrier between him and their hooves, whereas with cows he was happy to work without one, which obviously means cows are slags and enjoy someone rooting around in their nether regions.

Did Daisy turn her head and bat her eyes at you?
Spitroasting a toothless cow must be unforgettable, have you seen the length of it's tongue? Imagine that plaiting out your rusty sheriff's badge, Jeez!
 

endure

GCM
Talking to a vet years ago he said if he was doing anything that involved the rear end of a horse he would make sure there was a sturdy barrier between him and their hooves, whereas with cows he was happy to work without one, which obviously means cows are slags and enjoy someone rooting around in their nether regions.
Mooo...
 
OK, it's 02:23 and I've just read the whole thread. Very informative and has dragged up a load of personal stuff. At the moment, I'm waiting for queries with a Coroners Service and a FOI request to turn up with some answers about an uncle who died in prison. I've known about the death but no details as yet. This may lead to the mystery of who one of my granddads was, because he is curiously absent from all death certs of my parents' generation. There may be more than one father to various aunts and uncles and I know for certain, dead uncle was only half brother to my mum and possibly aunts. I know I'm about to hear unexpected stuff and how shocking that will be is dependent on who grandad was. More digging if I actually get a name. It seems they previous generation were sworn to secrecy about him, but the lack of Father's Name on documents and granny keeping her maiden name gives the game away. The only question now is who was he? Definitely a soldier in the first war. I'll post more when I know more
Life & families are complicated Times were different, times were the same..you can't change the past. Hope it's interesting & no judgement, so much
 
Remember watching the dung carriers in Nepal. Not unsurprisingly, one of the lowest castes.
Animal and human waste.

Carried on their backs.

In a hessian sack, so the liquid contents would leak out, dribbling down their backs and legs.
A bit like me this morning after a fart thinking I was safe after a bout of D&V
 
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