Would you shag a corpse

Continuing the current ' Would you shag...' trend. I have. Or at least I thought so until it started snoring.
I work p/t for a funeral service. Trust me, you would'nt.

..............but as this is the NAAFI: maybe, but definately not one after a PM, just in case the stitches burst.


Book Reviewer
As said previously, after 24 hours a dead male is of no use to me...


Book Reviewer
Always being one to put my money where my mouth is, and being as it's Saturday night, I'm just off to the shed to get my mallet and I'll report back later.
Thanks for that post Jarrod, I was just going out the door when I saw it, and realised I'd forgotten my rubber gloves. Dunno about your suggestion though, I prefer them to at least begin with a little life in them. Anyway, kitted up, chav community - look out!!!!!


Book Reviewer
They'll make that noise when you bang the corpse too, you'll think you are a super stud.
I had something similar happen to me once - turned out the girl was epileptic and she was having a fit.

While I lasted mind, some of the best sex I've ever had. it was like a bucking bronco. :)
Would you kiss it mid coitus?
I once kissed a week old corpse. Can't recommend it at all. I still can't rid of the taste.

For those of you still intent on a bit of necro nastyness, bear the following in mind:-

They won't have had much of a bowel movement since they died. They'll be packed with sh1t that could be weeks old as well as the remains of that pork curry that killed them.

Their sphincter muscles will be shot. While this will ease your entry for some backdoor bravado, it'll also ease the exit of the sh1t/curry mixture that the corpse is smuggling.

Be sure to use appropriate protection. A pair of chest waders and some of those super strength, purple, rubber gloves is the least you should be considering, if not a full NBC suit and respirator. Jarrod can supply the gloves and a mains powered KY gel warmer if you ask him nicely.
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