Work f**k ups and how to get away with them! Confession time

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by BlotBangRub, Aug 10, 2007.

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  1. So what about a thread confessing to major f**k ups at work and how you extricated yourself from them?

    We must all have skeletons in our cupboards along these lines. :oops:

    Here’s a quick one for starters:

    When I was a Police officer, I lost the sole piece of physical evidence in a criminal case. Court looming and can I find the bloody thing? (The evidence store is for poofs!)

    I had a particular hatred for the defendant, (totally evil, dangerous scumbag) so I go and buy the same item down town at lunch time, in the evidence bag it goes, write up the labels and the job's a good’un!

    Dickhead got 6 months, although he was guilty as sin, so I was not fitting him up or anything.

    He is now doing a lengthy stretch for manslaughter, having gone on to kill two men in the one night, cnut.

    A victory for justice! :D :D :D

    Get owning up ARRSERS!
  2. Bloody hell, BBR... I suppose it's ok considering the evidence was there in the first place, but still!

    Good drills. ;)
  3. Did the evidence eventually show up?
  4. I can't remember now, probably not. I do remember throwing the replacement in the skip though.

    I want some confessions here chaps, I've got loads and I am feeling very lonely and isolated here so far. :oops: :oops:

    There is safety in numbers! :wink:

    For legal purposes lets just state that all tales told here are purely fictional.
  5. Is it fuck!

    Still, the (hopefully) right bloke went down for it.
  6. Too many things to confess to, we'd be here all day I'm afraid.
  7. Oh it was him alright, I witnessed it.

    Trust me, the guy is an evil, evil man.

    2 murders, reduced to manslaughter, rape (got a way with it) serious assaults, burglary etc.
  8. End justifies the means, BBR?
  9. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    I once sank a police car. We had had a lot of rain, and roads were flooded. I was on nights with a colleague known to all as 'Tiger' (legends galore about him).
    We decided that the only way to check if a road was passable was to drive it. Probably a Mk 2 Escort wasn't the optimum vehicle, but was all we had. Halfway through a very quiet night, and bored to bugger, we came to a ford, Tiger thought it looked too deep, but as I was driving I thought we could make it, so went for it. As the water rose inside the car to knee height, I was having second thoughts. Tiger was on radio saying " This is B43, we are sinking fast, this will be our last transmission', and then gave our location, just a moment before radio cut out, along with everything else. We got out of car, and were waist deep in fast-flowing water, and pushe (floated?) car back onto dry-ish ground, where we proceeded to bail it out. A short while later, a Traffic div Range Rover arrived, with a sgt named Sam, who asked -from other side of ford- how to get to us. Wasn't impressed when I told him to drive through. Car eventually started, which was a great advert for Fords.
    I thought I would be suspended from driving, and possibly work, but my Chief Super was a copper of old school, and congratulated me on initiative.
    Tape of Tiger's message did the rounds of force for months. From then on, our callsign was always given as 'Stingray 2'.
  10. I didn't affect the outcome of the case, he was guilty.

    I just made sure he had one less loophole to wriggle through.
  11. Presume the evidence in question wasn't a corpse then :wink:
  12. :D :D :D

    It was an offensive weapon case. I just lost the 'weapon' :oops:

    He had tried to wrap it round my head, so I am in no doubt about his guilt. :threaten:

    I'm not that bad guys!!!!

    It wasn't the Guildford 4 or anything.
  13. Dont lose any sleep BBR, sounds like he deserved it and the streets are safer with him off them.

    Typed an email intended for a friend majorly slagging the boss off and calling him all sorts of colourful names. Only sent it to the boss himself. Twat. Got dragged over the coals for that little gem.
  14. Reviewing the SOCO pics we noticed in one outside shot an empty black bin liner the wind had blown under a bush.

    DCI wanted this case 110% water tight- no room for a clever brief to throw any shadow on our evidence.
    Problem was the bag had nothing to do with the crime and had blown away
    so wasn't bagged.

    Not good enough for our DCI.
    Someone was detailed to find a black bag, bag it and log it as evidence.

    Of course it wasn't needed- ahem!
  15. YES!!!!!!!! :D :D :D

    Get in there, I was panicking I had posted in the bloody Scripture Union, not the NAAFI bar

    Next time; how I nearly caused a fatal aircraft crash and still got recommended for a commendation. :oops: