Women you fancy that you shouldnt

On a similar line to recent posts, I've lately noticed an actress that I have been unaware of previously.

Francesca Mills. She is... rather vertically challenged and is unlikely to be wrapping her legs around a special friend any time soon.

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I'm either up for an award for inclusiveness, or I'm going to Hell.

At least she's never going to get carpet burns on her knees.

Fancy going halves on a CO2 extinguisher?
Would I bollocks!

I rather shag my ex-, and she's let herself go so badly that even two paper bags and half-bottle of Scotch wouldn't help.
Seeing as the Scotch won't help you, I'll neck it, but you can still shag your ex!! Have a word with Pikey. He'd shag a scabby rat, through a durty clout. No need to check for a pulse.