Women... know your limits

Discussion in 'The Lamp and Sandbag II - The Tall Story Strikes B' started by Forces_Sweetheart, Feb 6, 2004.

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  1. In the office....


    When using a computer...


    When buying a new car...


    and then driving it....



    When attempting DIY..


    And when trying to control your man's annoying habits...

  2. I want one of those mice!
  3. And the best 30 seconds worth of telly around at the monent.....

    The ads for "Nuts" magazine

    "WOMEN - don' t expect any help on a thursday....."

    and a cracking "we've better things to do" web site too:


  4. How many had you had when you wrote that gunny :)
  5. But it all makes sense? 3rd gear is a nice gear, and the price of bread is always good to know, and omg petrol! See female lateral thinking....

    or maybe a very large quantity of alcohol.... 8O

    am off to see if i was a verbal drunk, hmm
  6. In the car:


    At the gas station:

  7. Blatantly plagarised from www.nutsmag.co.uk, but spot on

  8. Oh my God Aunty!
    I could do that job!
    Where do they hire?
    Am so excited!
    I can finally go to Mars!
    And visit Aunty BB!!!!

  9. Please note that with the arrival of the new "Drive-thru" cash point
    machines, customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their
    vehicles. To enable users to use this new facility the following
    procedures have been drawn up. Please read the procedure that applies
    to your own circumstances(i.e. MALE or FEMALE) and remember them for
    when you use the machine for the first time.

    • 1 Drive up to the cash machine.
      2 Wind down your car window.
      3 Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
      4 Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
      5 Retrieve card, cash, and receipt
      6 Wind up window
      7 Drive off

    • 1 Drive up to cash machine
      2 Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine
      3 Re-start the stalled engine
      4 Wind down the window
      5 Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
      6 Locate make-up bag and check make-up in rear view mirror
      7 Attempt to insert card into machine
      8 Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
      distance from the car
      9 Insert card
      10 Insert card the right way up
      11 Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside
      back page
      12 Enter PIN.
      13 Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
      14 Enter amount of cash required
      15 Re-check make up in rear view mirror
      16 Retrieve cash and receipt
      17 Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside
      18 Place receipt in back of cheque book
      19 Re-check make-up again
      20 Drive forwards 2 metres
      21 Reverse back to cash machine
      22 Retrieve card
      23 Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
      24 Re-check make-up
      25 Restart stalled engine and pull off
      26 Drive for 3 to 4 miles
      27 Release hand brake


  10. BFG, that was excellent, some day I'll post the things that have happened to me on my driving tests, and you can sit and give thanks I only have a scooter and never passed my test! One less woman on the road.....

    Say Amen!
  11. :hump:Women often complain that men use sex to get what they want. How is that possible when sex IS what they want?
    • Like Like x 1
  12. hotel_california

    hotel_california LE Book Reviewer

    And you decided to wait 10 years to tell us that? Holy thread revival!
  13. 10 years.....
    thread necro.jpg
  14. :smile:I'm new here, so sue me LOL And I didn't even notice the year of the thread HA HA HA (skulks away in embarassment)