Witty answers

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by sheldrake, May 24, 2006.

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  1. sheldrake

    sheldrake RIP

    Please help!

    My Boss is for ever saying that "it's my trainset". I find myself in the very unusual position of not having a sufficiently witty and ascerbic reply.

    Help much appreciated.

    Answers on an AB545a to ...............
  2. "Yes boss, you are a fat controller" would that be applicable.
  3. Unfortunately there appear to be leaves on the line.
  4. British Rail were "getting there", are we getting anywhere?
  5. And you appear to have no idea how it works.

    What gauge is it? I have an OO Hornby.

    Really boss? Do it run on Maerklin or Fleischmann track?

    Do you have any buildings?

    Do you like the track-mat system or is on a base-board?

    Have you ever driven a real train, it's very different to a toy one.

    They may not be the wittiest answers on the planet but are releveant to trainsets and should stop your boss in his tracks. Be his tracks N, P, HO, OO, O, G or full Stevenson 4' 8 1/2" gauge. It is unlikey that his tracks are Brunel's 7' 0 1/4" broad gauge.
  6. Change the headings on all memos/office paperwork to read -

    The Merioneth and Llantisilly Rail Traction Company Limited.
  7. AC, DC or both?
  8. AB545A PCI-X 4-Port Gigabit Ethernet Card.

    You can find an installation guide here


    I have similar problem MODBUS TPC/IP driver MBENET.EXE works nicely with Windows XP SP1 but fails on XP SP2. I know whom to blame (BG of course).
  9. I find 'fcuk off you red nosed basta*d' often works.
  10. Why is it still boxed?

    And made in China?

    It's only a scale model of reality.

    Oh no Dr Beeching!

    You would reply but you're feeling tender and you've run out of steam.

    Is that clock a carriage clock?
  11. That does go some way to explaining your perpetual stripey suntan and the fact that 27 years into your service you've still got eighteen months to push until your first re-engagement... :lol:
  12. sheldrake

    sheldrake RIP

    Right guys.

    Many thanks. My personal favourites (or put another way, the one's least likely to lose me my job!) are:

    "Yes boss, you are a fat controller"

    British Rail were "getting there", are we getting anywhere?

    It's only a scale model of reality.

    Sergey - the AB545a is a Fire Plan Proforma - remedial Army Form identifaction training for you my lad!

    Scottishcammy - highly inventive although possibly a tad extreme?

    Many thanks

  13. Feck no.. this is the best idea I've ever seen...

    Reminds me of the scene in Fight Club when the bloke beats himself up in his bosses office...

    Worth a try I reckon...