Wife giving you stick?

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by Biped, Nov 8, 2008.

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  1. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

  2. Surely a more appropriate revenge would have been to prove to her just how disgustingly fat and unattractive she is?

    Sometimes you need to be cruel to be kind.
  3. The killer blow.

    You're not coming out dressed like that are you?.
  4. That was good. Bet she took a while to get over it though :D
  5. Good one in the short-term but that just gives her the excuse to berate you for not giving her dosh to update her kit, and then leaving your credit card limp as she hits the shops.
  6. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Personally, I'd have stuck an issue Thundy under the table.
  7. Spider revenge of jilted husband...pmsl

    Saturday 28 September 1996 (Daily Telegraph)

    A HUSBAND took revenge on his wife's lover by taunting him with a five-inch Chilean spider, a court was told yesterday.

    The lover was so frightened that he had to take tranquilisers, Salisbury magistrates' court heard.

    Tony Smith, 45, a father-of-three, of Porton, near Salisbury, bought the spider from a local pet shop knowing that Kevin Knight, 50, was an arachnophobic. He then took it round to Mr Knight's house four miles away where Smith's wife Karen, 38, had previously moved in.

    Smith pushed his way into the house, said Ian Halliday, prosecuting. "Mr Knight ran down the hallway followed by the defendant who was swearing at him.

    "Mr Knight slipped and fell on the floor. The defendant then hit him in the face three times. A few minutes later Mr Knight felt a tingling sensation and realised that Smith had thrown a spider at him."

    Sarah Barnard, defending, said Smith, a former RAF pilot, was a man of good character but had flipped when his wife left him.

    Smith pleaded guilty to causing actual bodily harm and was granted bail on condition that he kept away from Mr Knight.

    The case was adjourned until next month for pre-sentence reports to be written.
  8. Wife? Credit card? Shops? Are you out of your ecking mind?
  9. I've just noticed something. Formalising a relationship with my wife and my iguana both required a written consent that I would look after them in return for ....well. both are laughing. I could boil the lizard......