Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Moodybitch, Mar 4, 2005.

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  1. Why, when waiting for the all clear and sneaking in the toilets at work for a crap, does the entire office need to use the lavs at the exact same time?!

    Parking one's breakfast at work is something I loathe having to do and I never seem to get away with having a personnel free washroom for the duration of my dump.

    Is this one of life's little jokes on us....and are there any other daily situations that just make you think...'fcuking typical!!'
    8O 8O 8O
  2. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator

    can i bang your back doors in? :twisted:
  3. Sorry Papa, are you responding to this thread or trying to chat me up? 8O :D
  4. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator

    both! 8)
  5. Get yourself appointed as the Fire Marshall. When you want a moment of tranquil solitude, instigate an impromptu fire drill. Once all your colleagues are lined up outside in the rain, you can pop back in to "make safe"
    The knowledge that everyone else is outside freezing their nads off, should only heighten your pleasure. :wink:
  6. I think you need to more up front and blatant about it by announcing your intent to go and release an otter by advising them to avoid the bog for 30 mins or so while you drop off some biological waste.

    Do a coulpe of lunges and pick your knickers out of the crack of your ARRSE, tuck a copy of the Scum under your arm and waddle off like you're just about to shit your pants. Unless they are following you in there to get a pervy look at your monkeys forehead they should leave you to open your vulcan bomber doors and deliver your payload in peace. :lol:

    Make a fuss about the stink when you come back and if challenged tell them that theres plenty more where that comes from :wink:
  7. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator


    you been spying on me? perv!
  8. papa-laz

    I've just read your post and almost pee'd my pants, perhaps she'll go two's, and we can play scuttle brothers, to me, to you, when I say change no1 becomes the no2, CHANGE!. Perhaps we can call her Dave as well!
  9. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator

    hmmm.... bloody good idea, that... CHANGE 'ROUND! :twisted:


    F uck... my gun bunny days are comming back to haunt me! 8O
  10. My name is Dave you cnut
  11. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator

    that's your sunday name, moody. it's wilfred during the week. get it right!
  12. Hey Dave you my wife now!
  13. and I'm dave, and so is everyone dave!
  14. Wife??

    I am a bloke
  15. So Moody, are you still holding it in

    You must be touching cloth by now? :lol: