Why teenagers sleep (and are generally rude)

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by top_soldier, Dec 8, 2010.

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  1. She drools a lot in her sleep as well, which is why she wakes up with her face stuck to her pillow.

    That's what I'd tell her if I was her dad anyway.
  2. Grumblegrunt

    Grumblegrunt LE Book Reviewer

    sometimes, a friend has a chavvy son who stayed in bed for 3 years missing loads of school and being kept back. the doctors said it was an illness and put in on meds.

    strangely on the two week ski trip he didnt miss a day.

    there is scope for the general illness that is the teenager - during a three year period or thereabouts the brain competely rewires itself. if the same tests were applied to an adult they would be commited as clinically insane and reckomended for nil release.

    explains x factor anyway, poor buggers havent got a clue what they are listening to.
  3. I'd throw one up her, nothing like a lazy, limp-limbed bit of jailbait to get my juices flowing (up her spout).
  4. Ouch puts my sleep pattern into perspective. I always thought the term "sleeping her life away" was hysterical when my mum used it about me. If I remember rightly she should have a long life ahead of her due to a study I heard about, which says the more you sleep the longer you live.
  5. I thought Whet was older than that...
  6. Is he still alive? Didn't he top himself on here?
  7. ******* hell. You must have been asleep since the crusades then.
  8. TBH, her mother wasn't eactly trying to wake here was she? I'm pretty sure everyone here has been woken at one time or another by:

    Being tipped out of bed
    The urge to vomit
    Being vomited on
    Damp clothing\mattress\bedding\combination of all three
    Being told 'You're on stag'
    A roommates inability to navigate your room in the dark with 10+ pints in them
    Active edge
    An explosion of some kind

    Please feel free to add to this list, and, rather surprisingly I find myself unable to think of any significant number of days where I simply 'went to bed' and woke normally during my years served.
  9. I know this one...is it because they are c...oh sorry, current affairs, I'll get my hoodie!
  10. RiflemanTom

    RiflemanTom Old-Salt Book Reviewer

    In Bulford: A drunk mate waking me up to let me sniff his finger.
    The Duty Bugler
    "Resperator Man" Does he still come to visit naughty Nig's these days?
    Mortars/rockets/Gunfire (Generally being had a go at by the Dune Coons).
    In Belize: A mate screaming because a giant centipede had latched onto his toe as he slept in his hammock.

    And probably lot's more....
  11. Source please - I'd like to read this study that goes against every other... That sounds like absolute drivel to me - more like the longer you sleep per day (beyond the optimum) the shorter your life expectancy.

    Most studies I have encountered state fairly logically that young people, teenagers in particular sleep more because of the amount of change and development their bodies are going through. 12 hours sleep for a child, 10 hours for a teenager are usual amounts due to this - from this point onwards an adult will sleep less and less as they get older.

    7-8hours per night is the generally agreed optimum...too much or too little and life expectancy is shortened and chance of cardiovascular disease raised.



    **Sleep Disorder Basics - Sleeping too little or too much might shorten your life
  12. And a mighty fine period in our history it was where men were men and women were treated like...women on Arrse!
  13. Probably just another way of trying to blag disability benefit. I mean, if druggies and alchie's can get it, why not some **** that can't be arrsed to get out of bed...!
  14. Once upon a time there was a bloke who used to continually turn up late for work, fall asleep in meetings or sometimes even nod off whilst on the phone. Fellow workers often noted these worktime episodes often coincided with consumption of large amounts of a popular carbonated beverage that smelt a bit stronger than usual. He used to wander around with this and people noticed it had the odd property of increasing in volume from time to time.

    After a lot of aggro all round he finally pitches up one day proudly bearing a long letter from an Consultant brain bloke stating that he suffered from "Excessive Daytime Somnolence Syndrome". Cue all manner of taking the piss type behaviour. HR started shitting themselves in the normal way so nothing done

    However this small problem resolved itself in a rather satisfactory manner when, as a result of Excessive Daytime Drinking Syndrome whilst off sick with Excessive Daytime Somnolence Syndrome, he ran his untaxed, un MoT'd and uninsured car up the back of a van before going into a rather deep and stinking ditch, all in the middle of his second driving ban. The driver and passenger in the van fished him out and he exhibited his gratitude by punching one of them. All of this was recorded on camera by the Plod chopper that had been called in to track him down after multiple reports of dangerous driving.

    Oh the joy of it.