Why my new car is better than jarrods new car

Which puff has the biggest?


  • Total voters
    69

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#1
Apart from the fact that my new car was not driven back from Stuttgart with my dear sister squirming Haribo's into the Connolly leather seats with her arse and screaming "YOU NAZI FUCKING BASTARDS WE'LL DO YOU NEXT TIME IN ALL YOU CUNTS" at a poor photocopier salesmen from Koln who was just trying to get home.

Apart from that...

We start on a fairly level playing field. Neither of us want some cunt in a cheap suit showing us what the buttons do. That is a puffs move and whilst me and jerrod may be called many things, a puff is not one of them. Not if you find your legs useful. We know how to use a steering wheel and some pedals, so off we go.

I'll start shall I? Good.

I noticed some little clear plastic strip sticking out from the inside of the windscreen, off of the door pillar. I assumed it was some factory tat that had been overlooked on the PDI so I tried to pull it off. But it was stuck.

Turns out, it is to slide your parking ticket under. So the parking attendant doesn't have to squint to see it.

I am sure jerrod will be here soon with some thing his new car has got, which mine has not.

Just as soon as he has got a hang on the steering wheel - pedals interface.
 
#2
Jarrod's car came with "soft furnishings". Apparently - he's even got net curtains on his rear windows.
 
#4
TID, if you've gone and bought a fucking Nissan nobody here will ever speak to you again......
Whatever it is, it had better have been built buy a bloke that sounds like Noddy Holder in the outer edges of Birmingham.
 
#7
Have you found the button that operates the ticket holder yet?
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
#11
I got a Chevrolet Spark. Dunno what jarrod got. You'd have to ask him.
A gentleman with your style and panache - A Chevrolet Spark? Are you having us on? Iron Duke, you have gone down in my estimation. You are obviously a 75 year old grandmother.
 

jarrod248

LE
Gallery Guru
#13
Apart from the fact that my new car was not driven back from Stuttgart with my dear sister squirming Haribo's into the Connolly leather seats with her arse and screaming "YOU NAZI FUCKING BASTARDS WE'LL DO YOU NEXT TIME IN ALL YOU CUNTS" at a poor photocopier salesmen from Koln who was just trying to get home.

Apart from that...

We start on a fairly level playing field. Neither of us want some cunt in a cheap suit showing us what the buttons do. That is a puffs move and whilst me and jerrod may be called many things, a puff is not one of them. Not if you find your legs useful. We know how to use a steering wheel and some pedals, so off we go.

I'll start shall I? Good.

I noticed some little clear plastic strip sticking out from the inside of the windscreen, off of the door pillar. I assumed it was some factory tat that had been overlooked on the PDI so I tried to pull it off. But it was stuck.

Turns out, it is to slide your parking ticket under. So the parking attendant doesn't have to squint to see it.

I am sure jerrod will be here soon with some thing his new car has got, which mine has not.

Just as soon as he has got a hang on the steering wheel - pedals interface.
Your grace I'm sure your car is very lovely but does it do 0-50 miles in 3 3/4 hours?
I'd a notion to stay overnight in Calais but the dirty cheese munchers turned us away from 14 hotels because we were English and lied about some public holiday. Dover was very nice though and they spoke some English.
 
#14
I always thought Dukey drove around in a DB5, or was carried around his estates on a palanquin borne on the backs of 50 slaves


I bet Js Bedford could turn his motor into spare parts
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
#15
I always thought Dukey drove around in a DB5, or was carried around his estates on a palanquin borne on the backs of 50 slaves


I bet Js Bedford could turn his motor into spare parts
I bet Jarrod's Bedford could out-drag it from the lights.
 

Auld-Yin

ADC
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#17
TiD comes from Newcastle - a Model T Ford would be classed as the latest model there.
 
#18
Jarrod's car came with "soft furnishings". Apparently - he's even got net curtains on his rear windows.
The 8th Emergency Service is now dead to you.
 
#20
Your grace I'm sure your car is very lovely but does it do 0-50 miles in 3 3/4 hours?
I'd a notion to stay overnight in Calais but the dirty cheese munchers turned us away from 14 hotels because we were English and lied about some public holiday. Dover was very nice though and they spoke some English.
The fucking wankers.

Calais? Trust us. We'll get you back. Wankers.
 

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