Why are you here??

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by loubella, Nov 17, 2007.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Its Saturday night - its half past 9 - why are you here and not out on the lash???
  2. Cos its Saturday
  3. Ah - well pointed out!!
  4. Because I'm sat watching Jimmy Carr's new stand up, drinking Magners and looking forward to trimming my wife's oh so sweet cunt before eating it like a ripe peach.
    I'll probably do a "two in the goo, one in the poo" whilst licking her clit. Only when she's cum will I stuff my b;loated, pre-cum dripping cock into her willing cunt.
    Any more stupid questions you dozy bitch?
  5. For the above read, I've got no mates, no bird and no life except acting like a fcuking retard on ARRSE you nobhead
  6. Im in a different time zone ( you know with this internet stuff- goes round the world in a second, or so I am told)

    So Im off out to the local in a few mins, mind wish I had sloppy second on
    threaders_vm's bit .
  7. Have you any idea how far I'd have to go to find a boozer that isn't full of alcopop swigging chav cnuts?

  8. It's half past nine on a Saturday night.

    Any chance of a twos up
  9. About 4 miles.

    I am in because I am waiting for ThreadersVM to give me a trim.

    Oh, and because I have been driving all day and, yes, before you start, the car looks even more like a skip.
  10. and at 20 quid each way in a taxi...

    could use a local doss house though, its a bit of a tip, but its cheap to stay in..
  11. So what's your excuse Jean Paul? Don't tell me........

    You're on the rigs.

    Yeah cheers. You're a geek sat at home with your mum. Your IP address is in Rutland you mong.

    Froggy craphat cunt.
  12. possibly because I'm a sad cnut :)
  13. I am affluently challenged at the moment so I have taken to browsing the arrse forums & watching Der Untergang on TV.

    It is a great shame that my once highly eventful social life has been reduced to this tragic status. But I have recently realised that attempting to meet any girly worth her salt in a nightclub, whilst highly intoxicated, is a forgone conclusion. Therefore, I have decided to stay in for a bit & consider investing in cucumber shaped y fronts & a tweed jacket so I might hang around the more toffy parts of London & get noticed by posh ladies.

    I remain &tc,

  14. Plus some muppet has now installed broadband, bonus. And I get to shite in her knicker drawers.
  15. So you'll taking it in the ass for £2 a pop like usual then?

    And as for what I'm doing here? I'm married, the boss is preggers and I don't intend giving her any reasons to completely lose it, she thinks up enough reasons for herself. :(