Who wouldn't you shake hands with and why?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by meat2veg, Jun 27, 2012.

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  1. Abu Hamza

    Edited to add.........because he's a cunt
  2. Justin Beiber...both my hands would be too busy bitchslapping him!
  3. Anyone at the moment just had a finger poo.
  4. Brenda will have had her gloves on so it does not count.
  5. Anyone associated with the IRA, Welsh/Scottish nationalists. Tony Blair, Alastair Campbell. Although I would shake hands with Gordon Brown only so tell him I could tell him he was the worst PM in modern times.Anyone who thinks Gypos are an oppressed minority.
    The farm manager who caught me trying to shoot bunnies with my air rifle last month, see Emporer Mong thread.
    Yes I do read the Daily Mail.
  6. A compulsive masturbator.

    If it's been sent from my HTC Sensation using Tapatalk then I'm probably pissed.
  7. [​IMG]


    ...plus any politicians...

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  8. Piers Cunting Morgan.
    • Like Like x 2
  9. Prof. Stephen Hawking - cos he is lazy.
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  10. I understand that the nurses don't often shake hands after one has made a voluntary semen donation.
    Or so I've been told.
  11. I thought that was kissing.
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  12. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Birds. Shaking hands with birds is always a bit awkward. Your natural instinct is to slide your left hand behind their right ear, pull them forward gently and whisper "You have put this situation is entirely beyond my control you scarlet hussy" whilst slipping your right hand into the small of their back.

    "Hi, my name is Kev" and a handshake is not quite the same.

    I'll shake hands with any bloke. If I mean it, I'll smile. If not, I have his right hand and he is six inches down from my eye-line so I can nut the cunt.
  13. So, Piers Morgan then.