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Who would make a good SoS for Defence?

#22
DigitalGeek said:
Might as well get someone who will make a proper job of things



After all, we don't need an independent nuclear deterrent do we. The world is a nice place full of flowers and butterflies, it must be, that nice European parliament says it is. Plus its all TOO much money darling! I mean how would we afford treating illegal immigrants on the NHS? Or sending ASBO kids off to Disneyworld Paris? if we get some new aircraft carriers, or helicopters. I mean what do they need helicopters for?

GET SOMEONE WITH A PAIR!!
Fkucking hell -we can't have her. She has baby scaring head and we could be accused of Crimes Against Humanity. :twisted:

I would go for Gen Sir Mike Rose beacuse as well as being a steely-eyed killer he is also highly intelligent and if a revision of the role of HM Forces is required he would be well placed to conduct it.

I wouldn't have Sir Jock Strap near the post. From him, a pat on the back would be a knife recce.
 
#24
tattybadger said:
rickshaw-major said:
I wouldn't have Sir Jock Strap near the post. From him, a pat on the back would be a knife recce.
Wouldn't have him as a Trolley Dolly on the Queen's flight , let alone as SoS!!
Tatty, I reckon his recent appalling performance in front of an MoD camera, feeling the nation's pain but concurring utterly with current No 10 thinking, steeling ourselves for some other poor buggrs sacrifice, was enough to preclude him from either position.
 
#25
rickshaw-major said:
DigitalGeek said:
Might as well get someone who will make a proper job of things



After all, we don't need an independent nuclear deterrent do we. The world is a nice place full of flowers and butterflies, it must be, that nice European parliament says it is. Plus its all TOO much money darling! I mean how would we afford treating illegal immigrants on the NHS? Or sending ASBO kids off to Disneyworld Paris? if we get some new aircraft carriers, or helicopters. I mean what do they need helicopters for?

GET SOMEONE WITH A PAIR!!
Fkucking hell -we can't have her. She has baby scaring head and we could be accused of Crimes Against Humanity. :twisted:

I would go for Gen Sir Mike Rose beacuse as well as being a steely-eyed killer he is also highly intelligent and if a revision of the role of HM Forces is required he would be well placed to conduct it.

I wouldn't have Sir Jock Strap near the post. From him, a pat on the back would be a knife recce.
Good Call R-M
 
#26
Negligent-Discharge said:
I can't stand Labour, but Jack Straw seems to have his head screwed on... comments please.........

FFS, all we want is decent kit, decent comms and decent transport
Jack Straw! FFS! You're having a laugh! All that back-stabbing, inbred, commie piece of shit is interested in is lining his own bank account and those of his mates in the Blackburn Labour Party.

The last thing that you'll get with him is decent kit, decent comms and decent transport.
 
#27
King_of_the_Burpas said:
tattybadger said:
rickshaw-major said:
I wouldn't have Sir Jock Strap near the post. From him, a pat on the back would be a knife recce.
Wouldn't have him as a Trolley Dolly on the Queen's flight , let alone as SoS!!
Tatty, I reckon his recent appalling performance in front of an MoD camera, feeling the nation's pain but concurring utterly with current No 10 thinking, steeling ourselves for some other poor buggrs sacrifice, was enough to preclude him from either position.
Not sure he's the sharpest tool in the box either - plus he's got a fucking stupid name.
 
#28
Instead of swapping one useless twunt for a more useful twunt, but one with no real say, what if we altered the roles and responsibilities of those in charge?

Grand Strategy: SoS Defence guides Parliament in the planning and development of
Strategy: Collaborative effort between SoS Defence and Service Chiefs
Operations: Service Chiefs under advisement from SMEs and commanders on the ground

The big problem at the moment is things that should be operational decisions being political decisions. The Service Chiefs should be free to decide where and how many of the assets they have available are deployed.
 
#29
Me :)

1. I have no military links.
2. I would have no idea how to fire a gun let alone load or strip the thing.

Right thats interview 1 passed and I'm looking good!

Army
Few more blokes yep got that
Choice of weapons from the H & K catalogue (available in all good stores)
More of them mini me things, looks cool when leathering the crap out of somthing
More rockety/morter jobs, as they look cool as well
Fcuk the landy, replace with big fook off tanks, village in the way, one terry hiding in it, level it
AH1 more please, and lots more hellfire jobs, new rule not allowed to land until all ammunition/ rockets are spent (saves storage costs, and taking them off then on again)
Get rid of Lynx, buy some of those massive russki helo's, look well ally

RAF
Get rid of the transport stuff, give contract to BA/Virgin/Easyjet, anything big need moving TNT/DHL/Fedex or borrow and Antinov.
Lots more fightery things that blow stuff up.
Convert a few double decker airbuses in a British B52, difficulty getting over/round mountain range, remove the mountain from the map, and it will p1ss the yanks of that we have a bigger one.

Navy
Scrap the new carriers, diesel is sooo yesterday, buy a couple of nuke carriers off the yanks.
Scrap the type 45 and all the rest, lets get back to dreadnoughts, load of fecking guns all over the place, with at least six big fcukers front and back, lets see the pirates face that down.

Easy any idiot can do it.
 
#30
leveller said:
Me :)

1. I have no military links.
2. I would have no idea how to fire a gun let alone load or strip the thing.

Right thats interview 1 passed and I'm looking good!

Army
Few more blokes yep got that
Choice of weapons from the H & K catalogue (available in all good stores)
More of them mini me things, looks cool when leathering the crap out of somthing
More rockety/morter jobs, as they look cool as well
Fcuk the landy, replace with big fook off tanks, village in the way, one terry hiding in it, level it
AH1 more please, and lots more hellfire jobs, new rule not allowed to land until all ammunition/ rockets are spent (saves storage costs, and taking them off then on again)
Get rid of Lynx, buy some of those massive russki helo's, look well ally

RAF
Get rid of the transport stuff, give contract to BA/Virgin/Easyjet, anything big need moving TNT/DHL/Fedex or borrow and Antinov.
Lots more fightery things that blow stuff up.
Convert a few double decker airbuses in a British B52, difficulty getting over/round mountain range, remove the mountain from the map, and it will p1ss the yanks of that we have a bigger one.

Navy
Scrap the new carriers, diesel is sooo yesterday, buy a couple of nuke carriers off the yanks.
Scrap the type 45 and all the rest, lets get back to dreadnoughts, load of fecking guns all over the place, with at least six big fcukers front and back, lets see the pirates face that down.

Easy any idiot can do it.
you have grasped many principles of what is really required young padwan. :wink:

Unfortunately all that is required to be SoS is the ability to repeat the present government matra of everything is shiny shiny good :wink: thus you would be a shoe in for the job :x
 

BuggerAll

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#31
I wouldn't mind doing it. Its a part time job anyway I could carry on with my other jobs. (Ainsworth must be a real no hoper if its all he can manage one). I'm not saying I'm very good but it's ranked as No21 out of 23 Cabinet jobs so I reckon even a mediocre like me could make a pretty good hash of it.

What would be my strategy? Repeat anything Gordon tells me to say and take skiing holidays in the run up to any important invasions. I'd leave the day to day running to the uniform types as long as they keep their traps shut.

Just one important question: How long before I'm entitled to a pension?
 
#33
tattybadger said:
Has the Emperor Mong taken up a full-time consultant's position with the Govt?
Yes. He's in 10 Downing St.






Keep up at the back there!
 
#34
As this is fantasy politics territory, may I suggest:

Margaret Thatcher (circa 1982 model) for PM
Max Hastings for defence (if I can't have him for PM - see below)
Tattybadger for Foreign Sec
TheDuke for Home Sec
GoodCo treasury
Jo Lumley for anything she wants :oops: :hump:
 
#37
tankie88 said:
My Labrador...probably make a better job than the mong there now.
On the same note but on a different thread, I've already proposed my gerbil (and he's been dead for thirty years) :roll:
 
#38
tankie88 said:
My Labrador...probably make a better job than the mong there now.
Mine certainly has more energy than this bunch of idiots...and more integrity. He always waits to be asked if he can put his beezer in the trough.
 
#39
Cuddles said:
tankie88 said:
My Labrador...probably make a better job than the mong there now.
Mine certainly has more energy than this bunch of idiots...and more integrity. He always waits to be asked if he can put his beezer in the trough.
Going off thread, like your hound, so did the troughing shameless MP's... all of them asked the weak kneed equally corrupt civil servants if they could put in for a duck island/ mink coated vibrator whatever and the civil servants said of cousre you can sir/ madam... fill your boots! :evil: Sad, but true.
 
#40
Hutton, once Brown is kicked into touch.
 

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