Who is the richest man on Arrse?

I’m well behind on the wealth stakes.

You know those dreadful aristos who are always complaining that they don’t have enough money to fix the heating in their castle?

That’s me.

I’ve got a load of assets that I can never sell and a reasonably well paid job that just about covers the living costs of a family of four, with a fairly average middle class lifestyle.

I do a fairly good job presenting an illusion of wealth. I drive a Ferrari that actually cost less than a well specced Golf, our house is stunning but it’s falling apart, the speedboat on my drive was 1500 quid and doesn’t work properly, the wife’s Mercedes is leased on the cheapest possible deal we could find and her magnificent fake titties were freebies off the NHS.

We own half a hotel, pub and farm business that is mortgaged up to the hilt and has been hammered by the COVID.

I’m a long way off brand new Range Rover territory.

Lend us a tenner?


You'll be burning out the family castle next to avoid death duties.......
 
There are deffo whores though.
seared in my mind from when big bro ran a truck was going to pick him up from positioning a tipper at Workington Docks on a Sunday lunchtime, ready for the mon am discharge of a German Purlite bulker.
In bright sunlight at about 1 pm I watched two of the roughest whores imaginable climb the gangplank.
were talking fat fiftyish red plastic miniskirts over fat blotchy legs and faces like boxers with makeup.

Workington whores ! Even dont tell him pike probably wouldn’t!.


Used to a pub called the Sailors Return.....
On church St if memory serves, You just described several of the clientel

Some fairly wild nights to be had in there on very little money back in the day.
 
Just purchased a new boat. Add me to the arrse rich list.
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I've actually got more money than I know what to do with, I'm not rich but I can't think of anything I want to buy, nothing I need to get done involves money only time and effort.

I would buy some acres of woodland but I haven't got enough to buy a plot big enough to be worthwhile.
 
I've actually got more money than I know what to do with, I'm not rich but I can't think of anything I want to buy, nothing I need to get done involves money only time and effort.

I would buy some acres of woodland but I haven't got enough to buy a plot big enough to be worthwhile.
I have my serious investment plan for next weekend. Potatoes, Corn, Shrimp, Sausage, and Crab Legs the diet of the poverty stricken masses!
 
I've actually got more money than I know what to do with, I'm not rich but I can't think of anything I want to buy, nothing I need to get done involves money only time and effort.

I would buy some acres of woodland but I haven't got enough to buy a plot big enough to be worthwhile.


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Jambalaya?
Not quite. In my pursuit of new ways to consume calories my wife got me this for Father’s Day.

I got a propane burner and a 24 liter stock pot with a basket. Which will allow me to make a Shrimp Boil. I suppose jambalaya and stews would be more than possible. I have much research to do.


I am a real nerd, so hand me my apron as my place is in a kitchen!

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I've actually got more money than I know what to do with, I'm not rich but I can't think of anything I want to buy, nothing I need to get done involves money only time and effort.

I would buy some acres of woodland but I haven't got enough to buy a plot big enough to be worthwhile.
Try Woodlands.co.uk, you'd be surprised at how affordable some of the plots are. It's something I'm going for, the idea of having a few acres of woods to f uck off into when I want to retire from civilization for a bit is highly appealing, and it's something I can leave to my nephews and niece too. Also, not only are woods beautiful and peaceful and good for the soul, you can also hide a body or six in them.
 
Try Woodlands.co.uk, you'd be surprised at how affordable some of the plots are. It's something I'm going for, the idea of having a few acres of woods to f uck off into when I want to retire from civilization for a bit is highly appealing, and it's something I can leave to my nephews and niece too. Also, not only are woods beautiful and peaceful and good for the soul, you can also hide a body or six in them.
They're a company which sell 'problem' woodlands i.e. there is no access to haul lumber out if that's your intention.
 
They're a company which sell 'problem' woodlands i.e. there is no access to haul lumber out if that's your intention.
It depends on the individual plot and any covenants that are in place. Some plots have road or track access, others just a footpath. If you're looking to do a return from the timber then yeah probably best go elsewhere though.
 

964ST

War Hero
They're a company which sell 'problem' woodlands i.e. there is no access to haul lumber out if that's your intention.
I assumed that the thread title would be the answer. There is nearly always access with a chainsaw for a clearing and get your helicopter fleet to remove the trunks.
 
I assumed that the thread title would be the answer. There is nearly always access with a chainsaw for a clearing and get your helicopter fleet to remove the trunks.
Plenty of room for cutting up bodies with your chainsaw too, and drying the skins out so I, er I mean, you can wear them and dance naked around a f ucking big fire.
 
Try Woodlands.co.uk, you'd be surprised at how affordable some of the plots are. It's something I'm going for, the idea of having a few acres of woods to f uck off into when I want to retire from civilization for a bit is highly appealing, and it's something I can leave to my nephews and niece too. Also, not only are woods beautiful and peaceful and good for the soul, you can also hide a body or six in them.
I'm aware of them, I just don't have the money for a big enough plot and it has to be stand alone not in a wood carved up into little plots.
 
I've actually got more money than I know what to do with, I'm not rich but I can't think of anything I want to buy, nothing I need to get done involves money only time and effort.

I would buy some acres of woodland but I haven't got enough to buy a plot big enough to be worthwhile.
Cancel that, I've just seen an 800 quid mountain bike.
 
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