Who has sex with prostitutes on Christmas Day?

[RedDinger]

I'm disappointed with this thread. I thought it was an advert or a special offer.

 

[goodoldboy]

Just trying to work this out burn Maths isn’t my strong point so bare with me....

Average cock: 15cm
Average pumps up a whore: 100

thats 150m of cock per client x 500,000 clients

that’s about what, 1,500km of cock??

I hope she was serviced regularly....I mean I hope they have they changed the rubber....

No wait, isn’t she due resurfacing?

A hundred pumps? Blimey!

 

[triggerigger]

Sombody with the best wife ever all I get is socks

 

[Just_plain_you]

Yes, but when he does, he fills your stockings

And empties his sack.

 

[RumRationReject]

Using your numbers:
15cm cock x 100 pumps = 15m cock per client

500,000 clients x 15m = 7.5 million metres of cock or 7,500km.

Bloody teachers....

 

[Tallshort]

Went to the red light district in Hannover on Xmas eve once for a quite knee trembler. Only place open was Nxxxxxr alley. We were flying out to Bosnia on boxing day so I parted with 30 marks for a very unsatisfactory 3 seconds of semi pleasure (it was cold).

 

[lokiuk]

Yes, but when he does, he fills your stockings

And Snuggles socks

 

[TwoSocksJackson]

According to the ladies of the night, three types


The first: as expected, people who choose not to celebrate Christmas for one reason or another. “They booked on the day and were just happy to find someone who was working, although a few of us were,” she says of her past Christmas Day clients.

The second: people who simply get stressed out by the occasion and use sex as a coping mechanism. “I got the impression they were looking to blow off steam

The final category: those who desperately want to celebrate the occasion, but have no one to spend it with. This constitutes a substantial slice of the population.

Sex Workers On the Three Types of Christmas Day Client

Lizzy, an escort from Southampton, says the men she sees during the festive period fall into three distinct categories.

www.vice.com

Christmas is so commercial these days; everything is about money.

In my day one would invite a homeless person round for dinner and if she was suitably attractive offer her a bed and some male company for the night.

...and if she said yes, well that was a real act of Christmas charity.

 

[Civvy Scum]

Santa cums but once a year.

So it's not snow at the North Pole?

 

[Sonic67]

Did the 500 000th customer get a free bj and their picture in the local paper?

Like this:

 

[hairyarse2]

is Christmas not the time for a 3 bird roast...

Ho, Ho, Ho ?

If I wanted to disappoint two people at the same time, I would have invited her to my parents house.

 

[Lindermyer]

Who has sex with prostitutes on Christmas Day?​

Me if the wife doesnt start putting out


Fecking Bromide got nothing on wedding cake

 

[Andy Farman]

"I wouldn't, we don't have enough chairs for random hookers on Christmas day."

Is this the "Who has sex with rugby players on christmas day" thread?

 

[Ortholith]

Is this the "Who has sex with rugby players on christmas day" thread?

No, they're all propping up the bar and round the back.

 

[Andy Farman]

No, they're all propping up the bar and round the back.

As I said

 

[Harryc]

Apparently a sizeable portion of the population are alone at Christmas

So she averaged at least 25 men a day over 54 years. And they paid?

A whole 5c each.

 

[Harryc]

He still appears on regional news in the South East. Looks no different to he did all those years ago. Presumably he’s soaked in formaldehyde every night...

It is his favourite tipple.
He even treats Sangheeta to a pint every day.

It shows

 

[Richard Headicus]

So it's not snow at the North Pole?

You wish! Have a good one, and a MerryChristmas too.

 

[HCL]

I am reliably informed that +50 members of a PARA Bn did on a relatively recent Ex ASKARI STORM and that the enthusiastic customers weren't solely composed of the Tom's and NCOs.

Wet, slimy brillo pad sh@gging, No, thanks. Yuk!

 

[monkey123]

Have you all unwrapped your whores yet & given them a Christmas tip ?