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who do i have to kill!?

#1
i wont bore you all with the full mind boggling story of disinterested fuckbags who populate the Sky broadband unhelpful helpline. but to give you some insight in to my feelings towards them....ahem....fucking useless fucked up work dodging hippy dick washing fatherless cunts!

but the result of my weekend on the phone to these 'people' has left me massively frustrated. but my question is, what now?
im sat here fuming because somebody thought it would be a good idea to lift some poor gwarr in mumbai out of his cage and give him a 'job' with a phone.

but who do i make suffer for this? it makes no sense to me that i have to sit here and wait for myself to calm down while these shitlegs bastards are none the wiser as to my utter contempt and rage felt towards them.

any one any ideas as to how i over come this? solutions involving the prolonged suffering and excessive amounts of fear felt by the cretins at Sky would be most appreciated.

Ben
 
#5
I just binned Sky and they sent me a Customer Satisfaction Questionnaire to complete - set questions and tick the boxes.

So I added a few categories and a few choice comments along the lines of 'useless cnuts', 'brain dead mongs' and 'total fcukwits'. No doubt it will go in the bin...............but not before someone has seen it!!!! I only wish I'd sent it registered post to the Chairman of Sky....as if he'd give a shite!

So kill them all just to make sure you don't miss any mongs, the others we'll put down as collateral damage.
 
#6
had the same problem with aol.took me 2 years to sort it out,everytime i phoned their helpline i had to go through the same crap procedure all over again,not helped by the fact that i had to talk to someone whose english skills weren,t their strongest point.it took me 2 years to get to the bottom of the problem which was solved by a wireless router that a mate recommended and not aol!these fcuking companies stink with their customer services and in the most part they get away with it. :x
 
#7
jibman said:
had the same problem with aol.took me 2 years to sort it out,everytime i phoned their helpline i had to go through the same crap procedure all over again,not helped by the fact that i had to talk to someone whose english skills weren,t their strongest point.it took me 2 years to get to the bottom of the problem which was solved by a wireless router that a mate recommended and not aol!these fcuking companies stink with their customer services and in the most part they get away with it. :x
I heard an economics lecturer talking on radio a couple of weeks ago and he said exactly that, that they always will get away with it because the bottom line is that they don't give a shite - they are far too big and powerful for anything we say or do to make a dent on their profits.
 
#8
Benny,
I...er...work for Sky...er...Broadband but in a higher department than you were talking to.You were most likely talking to a level 1 'agent' in either Belfast,Londonderry or the Phillapines.
If you were told the 'systems were down,then you were speaking to Belfast & the person was telling you the truth.They crashed Thursday.
Let me know what's wrong & I'll look into it.
Spike
 
#11
I have just won a court case against a mobile phone retailer who tried the "it only has a one year guarantee" card. Refusing to repair a phone that was 12 months 2 weeks old ended up costing them £285. Remember guarantees are in addition to, not instead of your statutory rights.
 
#12
"Who do I have to kill?" :?

Try "whom".

Object of the verb "kill", thus accusative case.

Grammar has value, even in dealings with Sky. 8)

Whose representatives are a bunch of canutes, btw.
 
#13
caubeen said:
"Who do I have to kill?" :?

Try "whom".

Object of the verb "kill", thus accusative case.

Grammar has value, even in dealings with Sky. 8)

Whose representatives are a bunch of canutes, btw.
Ahh, who or whom? Now I understand.
Whom do I have to thank for this?
Caubeen ofcourse.
But Who is Caubeen?
 
#14
Legion_n_aire said:
caubeen said:
"Who do I have to kill?" :?

Try "whom".

Object of the verb "kill", thus accusative case.

Grammar has value, even in dealings with Sky. 8)

Whose representatives are a bunch of canutes, btw.
Ahh, who or whom? Now I understand.
Whom do I have to thank for this?
Caubeen ofcourse.
But Who is Caubeen?
You - like so many of us - have ultimately got the late Gen. Sir John Hackett to thank, dear fellow!

Whose representative on earth I - ahem - have the honour to be. 8) And who would have taken a very dim view of Sky, btw.

Have some of this very fine Bushmills . . . . . . :roll:
 
#15
Benny687 said:
i wont bore you all with the full mind boggling story of disinterested fuckbags who populate the Sky broadband unhelpful helpline. but to give you some insight in to my feelings towards them....ahem....* useless fucked up work dodging hippy dick washing fatherless *!

but the result of my weekend on the phone to these 'people' has left me massively frustrated. but my question is, what now?
im sat here fuming because somebody thought it would be a good idea to lift some poor gwarr in mumbai out of his cage and give him a 'job' with a phone.

but who do i make suffer for this? it makes no sense to me that i have to sit here and wait for myself to calm down while these shitlegs bastards are none the wiser as to my utter contempt and rage felt towards them.

any one any ideas as to how i over come this? solutions involving the prolonged suffering and excessive amounts of fear felt by the cretins at Sky would be most appreciated.

Ben
You could always call JPAC tomorrow with a JPA problem. They're useless tw@s as well ... but at least it would take your mind off your broadband issues!

But seriously, I had the same problem with TalkTalk reference my broadband. I fully understand your frustration. I resolved my problem with advice from a friend who is a Scaley IS Engineer, but I did write a letter containing a few home truths to the boss of TalkTalk. He never replied though ... can't think why!
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#16
You could try calling the Sky Broadband Helpline if you have a problem that requires a resolution.

If phoning them does not fix the problem for you, I suggest you call the Sky Broadband Helpline to see if they can fix it instead. If that doesn't work, then you need to call the Sky Broadband Helpline as they might have a solution for you.

As a last resort, call the Sky Broadband Helpline again, and again, and again, and again ad infinitum.

You could always switch to someone like Bulldog Broadband, though if it goes wrong, see the Sky solution.

Alternatively, try BT Broadband, though see the Sky and Bulldog solutions should the service not live up to expectations.

If you are a complete spoon, or window licker, you migh try the AOL service, but double up on all three solutions processes combined to get ANY form of service.

I've not heard anything too bad about Virgin though, so you migh wish to try them out.

Hope this helps.
 
#17
I'm with Sky Braodband at the moment. I've not had to deal with their customer services so I can't comment. I work in IT so I'm quite tech savvy so hopefully I wont need to.

My problem was with Talk Talk. They got the Direct Debit wrong three times, cut my service as I hadn't paud my bill (I thought the DD were setup). I cancelled my service mid Feb this year after which the 12 month contract had run out.

They went on to try to charge me £70 disconnection fee as my service hadn't been connected until April 06 when I had signed the contract in Jan 06 and therefore it was outside of the 12 month contract.

I've written a letter lately, as talking to the desk monkies left my blood boiling and getting nowhere faster that Linford Christie with a hedgehog up his ar$e.

Letter said that unless they removed the £70 disconnection fee and closed my account I would be asking the Telecomms Ombudsman to investigate my complaint and to look into the £70 disconnection fee to see if it is proportionate to the costs of the actual disconnection. I don't know if this will work but it's got to be worth a shot.

I am awaiting a reply but when I get one I shall post the result.

As an aside....during the numerous times I was put on hold I came up with a song. It's pretty much the same as 'I want Candy' by Bow Wow but you replace 'I want Candy' with 'I hate Talk Talk' and repeat.

Time for the medication again...caio!
 
#18
Orange Broadband is the worst customer service Ive ever had - one week i phoned them about 12 times and for 2 weeks i had cables running through my house cos they couldnt sort out my wireless connection. I still get problems with my internet everytime I switich on - but cos i cant understand anyone on the helpdesk i cant be bothered to ring (do they still play charlotte churchs song while your waiting?).
 
#19
sretosf said:
I have just won a court case against a mobile phone retailer who tried the "it only has a one year guarantee" card. Refusing to repair a phone that was 12 months 2 weeks old ended up costing them £285. Remember guarantees are in addition to, not instead of your statutory rights.
What argument did you use to persuade them they needed to fix it? I.e., what statutory right was not being upheld?

I'm interested to know because my car broke down one month after the three year warranty...

FF.
 
#20
Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.

The Personnel Manager said, "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it you cannot qualify for this job."

Mujibar said, "I am ready."

The manager said, "Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green."

Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, "Mister manager, I am ready"

The manager said, "Go ahead."

Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow', this is Mujibar."

Mujibar now works as a technician at a call center for computer problems.

No doubt you have spoken to him. I know I have.
 

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