Whither the ARRSE?

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by TheIronDuke, Mar 1, 2007.

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  1. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Many people have said “Well done chaps” to Bad CO, his gorgeous pouting assistant Daphne and the chaps behind this board, as the MOD appears to be embracing ARRSE as New Media, or “Clever use of ambient media” as it said in the report that went upstairs.


    But “Well done chaps” don’t put petrol in Bad CO’s Bentley Continental GT with bodywork by Mulliner, do it?

    So lets help out with some suggestions as to how the chaps can make the sort of money that would make Bransons rat like eyes water shall we?

    They could start with a decent IP adviser? © ARRSE? No coffee at the interview? Is that a fact? In future all interviews will be conducted in tastefully appointed rooms, with a view of Saint James’s Park. You can stick your coffee. Kindly ask if the chaps would like milk or lemon in their tea? And some decent biscuits. Not those pasty horrible fingers so favoured by the MOD.

    Bad CO’s fee? Glad you asked. £350.00 per hour, ex disbursements and travel.

    Phase 11 - Test driving kit (£350.00 per hour ex disbursements and travel).

    This week, PartTimePongo test drives the M1A2 Abrams main battle tank…

    ”Once on the road the first impression is of the enormous power available which needed careful pedal control. Although the steering was very positive it was somewhat heavier than that of the previous Abrams models and also the suspension was noticeably firmer.

    A few miles to get familiar with the tank were essential and exploring the navigation system occupied much of this time. One of the most valuable appraisals of any tank is to ask your wife what she thinks. She was most impressed when she first saw the tank standing alongside my FV4034 Challenger 2 (which she dearly loves) and she found getting in and out of the tank presented no problems in spite of her physical disability.

    She was very impressed with the appearance of the facia but was particularly intrigued by the navigation system which neither she nor I had experienced previously. Whilst on my own the performance was explored and this can only be described as exhilarating with legal speed limits being reached before you have time to look at the speedometer”.

    That’ll do for starters. Lets have some blue sky thinking here chaps. As they say at the MOD, lets think outside the box
  2. What the fcuk are you on about?
  3. I think he pimping.
  4. what a pile of dogshit.
  5. Umm... what? Can't quite grasp what you on about.
  6. Eh! Pardon! WTF is going on?
  7. thank god...i thought it was my eyes! But it IS drivel!!
  8. Most of his posts make little sense. On this occassion TheIronDuke is bezzering and trying to tongue the Bad CO's date
  9. I got this far before my eyes started to bleed.

    You made my Civy throw up Duke, is that what you wanted? Because that's what you have done.
  10. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Yeah, I'm well hated over there. They made me a Mod to show me my place. Never been so humiliated.

    Tell you what Charlie? Do a Google on 'Irony'. You'll be amazed. Or better yet, why not register over at Brawl Hall? We can have a nice little chat and a cup 'o tea?
  11. I think I'd rather slam my balls in the armoury door but thanks for the offer
  12. Maybe you'll be made a MOD on here too, especially after you've finished rimming BadCO's colon.
    If you use a speculum you'll be able to get your entire head up his arse.
  13. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Nah, I'll give it a miss thanks. Humourless tubes with a sense of humour by-pass aint really my line of country. Factor in weirdo's posting their homo-erotic fantasies about bizarre insertions - well, you can see my problem, eh?