Whinging Wives

#1
Dictated by my spouse:-

Having been an Army Wife for the last umpteen years it still gets my goat that some people think everything should be handed to them on a plate.

Recently, whilst picking my child up from the pre-school I overheard a coven of wives grumbling about the forthcoming deployment.  It went something like this:

Wifie 1 - "This place is a dump - two weeks after my husband goes I'll be bored"

Wifie 2 - "I know, I can't wait to get away from here"

Wifie 3 - "There's nothing to do here"

This really irritated me as it's not as if the camp is in the middle of nowhere (East of England and 2 mins from the A1).  Even if they can't drive the Fams Office has arranged shopping trips during deployment and the camp itself has a Gym and a swimming pool which are both open to dependants.

My point is that even if these facilities weren't available, why should wives expect anything when their husbands go away?  Are they not grown ups able to look after themselves?
 
#2
I THINK THE WIVES ARE MORE GROWN UPS THAN THEIR HUSBANDS .YOU SOLDIERS DON'T KNOW ABOUT WORKING  HARD.YOU HAVE A LOT OF LEAVE /GET YOUR MONEY BY THE END OF THE MONTH / SKI ./DIVING/AND ALL THE OTHER ADVENTURE TRAININGS  HA,HA JUST CALL IT HOLIDAY AND FUN WITHOUT KIDS AND WIFE.PARTY !!!BUT SOON YOU HAVE TO GO AWAY YOU WHINGING BECAUSE YOU CAN'T GET ALKOHOL.THAT'S THE ONLEY WORRY SOLDIERS HAVE OH AND THE SE*.LUCKY YOU GOT YOUR OWN FEMALE SOLDIERS!!!!! TO HELP OUT. SO I DON'T KNOW WHY SO MANY MARRIAGES FALLING APART AFTER A TOUR!!!! ::) ::) ::)
 
#5
SOLDIERS DON'T KNOW ABOUT WORKING  HARD.YOU HAVE A LOT OF LEAVE /GET YOUR MONEY BY THE END OF THE MONTH / SKI ./DIVING/AND ALL THE OTHER ADVENTURE TRAININGS  HA,HA JUST CALL IT HOLIDAY AND FUN WITHOUT KIDS AND WIFE.PARTY !!!BUT SOON YOU HAVE TO GO AWAY YOU WHINGING BECAUSE YOU CAN'T GET ALKOHOL.THAT'S THE ONLEY WORRY SOLDIERS HAVE
I can only assume from your rant and your sign on name that you are one of those German wives who are more than happy to be married to a British soldier when he is stationed in Germany but the moment he is posted elsewhere then I think it's fair to say "the honeymoon is over".

I hate to p*ss on your parade boxhead but you're not the first German wife to realise that the guy she married was an immature sprog overwhelmed by regular sex.  The scenario is a familiar one;  young soldier, new in Germany, splashing all his money on beer and gyros meets local "good time" girl, sh*gs like a bunny (probably for the first time), thinks with his little head and before the blood rushes back to his head finds himself hitched to Frau Frankenstella and a little Herman on the way.

The problem then is, that immature sprog starts to grow up, sees what a good time his single mates are having and wants a part of it.

Not fair?  Probably not, but then who said life was fair?


SOLDER_WHY..............

HOW :'( SAD ARE YOU FOR YOUR AGE!!!!!!!!!
But then you don't know how old or how sad I really am!!



P.S.  STOP TYPING IN CAPITALS - IT'S CALLED SHOUTING!!!
 
#7
I am a wife - but one who articulates concerns and doesn't whinge. For the last couple of months I have noticed that wives in are in fact unsung heroes who have much to shoulder and little reward, other than loving their family. ;)

I firmly believe that if they feel there is nothing to do, make something to do. We are mostly bright women who have bags of initiative and lots of ideas. So why not see what can happen if we communicate them to our welfare offices?

So far, I like many others have not seen much to put my faith in the welfare system. But I do live in hope. What I think we all have to remember is the people employed within welfare are there to service a client group - and that's us. If you buy anything faulty, you bring it back and complain don't you? So, if you feel that enough isn't being done for us on this very difficult deployment tell the welfare guys. After all, they aren't mystic meg and are men who are primarily tyring to work with women, so why don't we give them a bit of help and encouragement?

Mind you, there are some in the welfare office where we are who far outshine others... :)
 
#9
I guess you wrote your own little personal life down
If you must know boxhead, my wife, who I have been with happily for the last 13 years, comes from the same town as I do in the UK.

My comments stem from experience in my job of the welfare difficulties that soldiers approach me with.

I can only assume that your argument is weak, or I struck too close to home if you have to retort with childish criticisms.
 
#11
In which case, boxhead, I must apologise for not coming down to your level - I started this thread with the intention of provoking mature and informed debate.  If all you want to do is initiate name calling and tit-for-tat posts I suggest you stick to the NAAFI. :mad:
 
#12
You have no level mate or why did you started "Whinging wives"It's a shame that people like you work for the welfare. :'( stick your next reply up your ........you boring me!!!!!
 
#13
QED - I think sums things up

Good post from Lucy.  I was in for 9 years and spent most of my time away from wife and kids, generally leaving them in a foreign country with few contacts.

The first time my wife actually complained what a crap time she had had was when I was medically discharged.  Her view being that it was a job I loved and why should she make me change what I was doing when we met.  Instead of bumping her gums she found things to do and made the most of it.  

I agree with Soldier_Why's summary of standard squaddie path to marriage although you missed out the escape the block piece.  I would also probably suggest that prior to marriage - both parties should work out who their marrying and what they do (as a hint - soldiers move a lot, live on the patch, go on tours and are underpaid - so live with it)

I wasn't going to have a bitch but some of the post may be improved by the author getting a life (and a dictionary)

Very entertaining posts though  :D

Oh and I did play loads of sport and go skydiving (when not in Bosnia, Ireland, Falklands, Gulf ...)..... but then so did my missus (subsidised as she was a wife of :p)
 
#16
I think you could be right Lucy.  My missus just wanted to know if wives whinging was the norm or just isolated to a select few. ;D

You're right in what you say though, there are spouses out there (I hesitate to say wives!) who accept the myriad of uncertainty that comes with being married to a soldier and I for one would give them all a medal.  It's just a shame that there are others out there who give the (silent) majority a bad name.

Induction day for spouses? - Now there's an idea ;)
 
#17
I didn't go down the avenue of becoming a missus for quite some time, I liked the idea of being able to live in sin! I tell you what though, this is the first time my other half has been away and welfare have actually sent me letters, invited me to things etc! Before we got married (eventhough we had been together a long time and had children) welfare and "wives" treated me as though I was number 2s, not pooh, I mean dress! But similar anyway!

So the idea of an induction would be really funny, but only if girlfriends/partners could attend! Oooh sir/ noses out of joint, jealousy in the room sir/ me thinks so! God the idea of it!
 
#18
Late response from me.  couple of Regiments I served in had wives courses each year to let the wives have a play with the kit.  

They were very funny and a great laugh (but a little embarressing when they beat the soldiers running the course  ;)

As for treatment of wives vs partners - it's a crying shame.  Mate of mine was due to get married in Aug but then had to step in to take a Sqn to the Gulf.  In order to prevent wife to be from getting left out they got married in a Registry office at 2 days notice.... gues they'll have to delay the Honeymoon
 
#20
A bit late for me in replying but I must say Lucy hit the nail on the head with her post.

It doesnt matter is your husband is away on course, exercise or anywhere else you are always going to find that some wives do whinge and then there are those wives that get on with thier lives without whinging.

Soldier_Why you dont have an easy job as you are on call 24/7 but I,m sure that there will be many wives who will be very grateful for all the hard work you and the rest of your team do.
 

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