While you were Walting ....

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Rocketeer, Oct 28, 2005.

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  1. While the sharpshooters at ARRSE were sighting in on Walts, the "feckin' poor aminal/veggies are us " brigades have slipped through parts of their evil plans

    PETA is jumping up and down with glee that Italy has banned Fishbowls!.. Yes, that's right, no typo.. Seems they convinced the Eyetye gov'mint that round fishy bowls are detrimental to the health of Nemos everywhere.. apparently the shape stifles oxygen generation and can make the little slippery buggers go blind or crazy as they end up swimming aimlessly in circles.. So, If you want to keep fishys in Rome, you got to have an aquarium of proper size and dimension 'cause little fishies are distinct creatures worthy of our ' respect.'

    Wait!! that's not all.. the Italian government has legislated that any dog owner must, under pain of fine and nasty looks from the Carabinieri, walk Fido a minimum of 3 times a day...

    Wait,, there's more.. British farms are now using automated booths where cows can choose to be milked..

    ???

    The information on the new device, developed in the Netherlands, says it saves time and money by allowing the cows to decide when they want to be milked.. "this shows respect to the cows by allowing them to manage their own lives. "..." The cows set their own agendas "..." its about autonomy, its about enrichment. Its about stepping back and allowing the cows and the system to develop a relationship "

    To induce the cows to enter the automated milking booths, the facility offers such perks to Bessie such as hair-brushing, and gives the animals the choice of hot or cold water rinse on their udders.

    mad, mad.. the world is going mad...

    we now return you to the regularly scheduled chav/walt target shoot on ARRSE1
     
  2. Gremlin

    Gremlin LE Good Egg (charities)

    And how does Bessie express her desire whether to be fisted or not by the
    local James Heriot??? A coquetish wiggle of the rump perhaps?
     
  3. Is there a nice quiet place for them to go when they decide "Fcuk it! I feel like getting knocked on the head, eviscerated and dismembered to provide yummy meals for my human friends"?
     
  4. Feck me walk the dog three times a day, is that all mine insists on four at half hour minimum duration. When we bought him his papers stated cocker spaniel but he keeps saying he's a doberman, I think my dog may be a walt.
     
  5. I just knew that cows would take over the earth one day, choosing when to milk themselves is the first step. :lol:
     
  6. I'm not sure if I should reveal my knowledge of (what I always thought was) a useless fact but:

    Italy is the largest producer of plastic aquariums in the world.

    Presumably the legislators in Rome had no idea that they were effectively banning imports and ensuring that their own industry got a boost as a result :roll:

    Wish our mob would switch onto opportunities like that.