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Where men are men

#1
An illegal and his wife and six kids have managed (without too much difficulty)to get a five bedroom house with a big garden, in a nice area. After a couple of weeks of settling in, he's wandering round the garden and comes across a couple of chickens that have got in from next door through a little hole in the fence. He's trying to catch them for dinner when his neighbour spots what's going on and tells him to leave his chickens alone. The illegal isn't giving a flying f**k, the birds are on his property and where he comes from, that makes them his. A furious argument follows and finally the neighbour says. "Look here mate, in this country we settle these sort of arguments like men..man to man." The illegal says. "Where I come from, we settle also man to man" The neighbour climbs over the fence and says." Right.. I give you a kick in the bollocks and then you give me a kick in the bollocks and the last man standing keeps the chickens, ok?"
"Yes,sure, ok."
The neighbour takes a run and delivers an almighty kick into the illegals' meat and veg and he sinks to the ground, puking and groaning and clutching elephant sized bollocks. The neighbour makes for the chickens, then, stops in disbelief as the green faced illegal slowly starts to hobble towards him saying. " My.... turn.... now....mister." The neighbour says. "Keep the f****n' chickens, they belong to the guy the other side of me."
 

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