Where can my lad get really beasted?

#1
So my son, 16 a few weeks ago, went off on one today and decided he was leaving home.

Me and his mum have done everything for him, and my daughter. She is twenty and a medical student.

When my son shouted he was frightened of me in case I beat him up, my daughter pushed me to the floor and went for him! Seriously my wife held her back! He was backing away from her!

Just for the record, I haven't hit my kids ever. I spanked him about ten years ago, but then I decided that shite wasn't and never really did anything positive so I stopped and just focused on making them see what was wrong with whatever they did.

But he seems to think this is the worst possible home. A nice, middle class home, with whatever he wanted provided! A sharp-elbowed parents, who got him into a good secondary school. Ffs I gave him a gibson SG for his birthday! For my sixteenth I got a ZX81 and a talk about how my mum and dad couldn't keep me forever!

My medical student daughter thinks he may have some underlying Oedopiceal condition!

Anyway. My son has said if he doesn't get his gcse grades- which he will because he's clever- he wants to join the army. So I want to know what he can join that will really make it clear just what he's leaving! If he sticks it I will shake his hand and tell him that he is a better man than I am! Seriously I really mean that.

I don't know why he hates me. He stood in the middle of his mates house earlier and said F you I'm not coming home. I lost it and gripped him and shoved him into my car! I have apologised to the mum of his friend, but I love my son and want him home. But if he wants to really leave home I want him to be safe, and yet realise just what his mum and me have done for him.

So... where can I somehow direct him so he will be beasted within an inch of his ******* life, so basically he knows exactly what real life is all about?

I want somewhere that after six weeks he will be on the phone to his mum to beg her to fetch him! And after two months he will be on the phone to me to forgive him everything if he pays to get him released?

As I say, if he gets through it I will call a better man than I.
 

Joker62

ADC
Book Reviewer
#2
Syria?
 
#3
#4
any Catholic church?
 
#6
So my son, 16 a few weeks ago, went off on one today and decided he was leaving home.

Me and his mum have done everything for him, and my daughter. She is twenty and a medical student.

When my son shouted he was frightened of me in case I beat him up, my daughter pushed me to the floor and went for him! Seriously my wife held her back! He was backing away from her!

Just for the record, I haven't hit my kids ever. I spanked him about ten years ago, but then I decided that shite wasn't and never really did anything positive so I stopped and just focused on making them see what was wrong with whatever they did.

But he seems to think this is the worst possible home. A nice, middle class home, with whatever he wanted provided! A sharp-elbowed parents, who got him into a good secondary school. Ffs I gave him a gibson SG for his birthday! For my sixteenth I got a ZX81 and a talk about how my mum and dad couldn't keep me forever!

My medical student daughter thinks he may have some underlying Oedopiceal condition!

Anyway. My son has said if he doesn't get his gcse grades- which he will because he's clever- he wants to join the army. So I want to know what he can join that will really make it clear just what he's leaving! If he sticks it I will shake his hand and tell him that he is a better man than I am! Seriously I really mean that.

I don't know why he hates me. He stood in the middle of his mates house earlier and said F you I'm not coming home. I lost it and gripped him and shoved him into my car! I have apologised to the mum of his friend, but I love my son and want him home. But if he wants to really leave home I want him to be safe, and yet realise just what his mum and me have done for him.

So... where can I somehow direct him so he will be beasted within an inch of his ******* life, so basically he knows exactly what real life is all about?

I want somewhere that after six weeks he will be on the phone to his mum to beg her to fetch him! And after two months he will be on the phone to me to forgive him everything if he pays to get him released?

As I say, if he gets through it I will call a better man than I.
Cont'd p94 Readers Letters.
 
#7
So my son, 16 a few weeks ago, went off on one today and decided he was leaving home.

Me and his mum have done everything for him, and my daughter. She is twenty and a medical student.

When my son shouted he was frightened of me in case I beat him up, my daughter pushed me to the floor and went for him! Seriously my wife held her back! He was backing away from her!

Just for the record, I haven't hit my kids ever. I spanked him about ten years ago, but then I decided that shite wasn't and never really did anything positive so I stopped and just focused on making them see what was wrong with whatever they did.

But he seems to think this is the worst possible home. A nice, middle class home, with whatever he wanted provided! A sharp-elbowed parents, who got him into a good secondary school. Ffs I gave him a gibson SG for his birthday! For my sixteenth I got a ZX81 and a talk about how my mum and dad couldn't keep me forever!

My medical student daughter thinks he may have some underlying Oedopiceal condition!

Anyway. My son has said if he doesn't get his gcse grades- which he will because he's clever- he wants to join the army. So I want to know what he can join that will really make it clear just what he's leaving! If he sticks it I will shake his hand and tell him that he is a better man than I am! Seriously I really mean that.

I don't know why he hates me. He stood in the middle of his mates house earlier and said F you I'm not coming home. I lost it and gripped him and shoved him into my car! I have apologised to the mum of his friend, but I love my son and want him home. But if he wants to really leave home I want him to be safe, and yet realise just what his mum and me have done for him.

So... where can I somehow direct him so he will be beasted within an inch of his ******* life, so basically he knows exactly what real life is all about?

I want somewhere that after six weeks he will be on the phone to his mum to beg her to fetch him! And after two months he will be on the phone to me to forgive him everything if he pays to get him released?

As I say, if he gets through it I will call a better man than I.
Maybe the armed forces isn't for him?

How about some life experiance?

He could just go for it and end up SNLR because he can't cope psychologically

Isn't paying bills enough, some heart ache, fights in the pub etc to see what the world really is
 
#8
FWIW, he probably doesn't hate you. He's got hair on his chest & balls, voice cracked, testosterone up the ying-yang; he's growing up. Your task is to not let his testosterone-fueled episodes get the better of you. You're the adult here. Recognize it for what it is, an adolescent attitude thing.

A few months ago, my stepson got caught in a lie over his grades and what work he'd turned in. Dumbass forgot that my wife (his mother) is a teacher in his school :) Anyway, he got all arrsey and squared up to me. I'm an inch or two taller and 100lbs heavier. Not to mention 30 years older and wiser. I just laughed at him and he backed down. It's been fine since then, and we've got on a lot better than we ever have. But he knows that he's not going to physically intimidate me, or anyone else in my family in my presence.

It's a phase. Zits, voice breaking, discovering how to undo a bra closure, shaving, whatever. We've all been through it. Best of luck.
 
#9
FWIW, he probably doesn't hate you. He's got hair on his chest & balls, voice cracked, testosterone up the ying-yang; he's growing up. Your task is to not let his testosterone-fueled episodes get the better of you. You're the adult here. Recognize it for what it is, an adolescent attitude thing.

A few months ago, my stepson got caught in a lie over his grades and what work he'd turned in. Dumbass forgot that my wife (his mother) is a teacher in his school :) Anyway, he got all arrsey and squared up to me. I'm an inch or two taller and 100lbs heavier. Not to mention 30 years older and wiser. I just laughed at him and he backed down. It's been fine since then, and we've got on a lot better than we ever have. But he knows that he's not going to physically intimidate me, or anyone else in my family in my presence.

It's a phase. Zits, voice breaking, discovering how to undo a bra closure, shaving, whatever. We've all been through it. Best of luck.
It's ******* hard!

I let him know in no uncertain terms I was the adult and he shat himself! He has never had a real adult get stroppy with him. Perhaps that's the whole problem?

Anyway thanks for the advice. He needs to know what a loving home me and his mum have provided.

I grew up in the seventies and we had a different outlook. My dad clouted me periodically for doing something twatish like bringing a dead rat into the house that me and my mates had shot with our air rifles on the farms round by our house, but I would never have dreamed of thinking that was abuse!

I think he needs the snowflake removing!
 
#10
It's ******* hard!

I let him know in no uncertain terms I was the adult and he shat himself! He has never had a real adult get stroppy with him. Perhaps that's the whole problem?

Anyway thanks for the advice. He needs to know what a loving home me and his mum have provided.

I grew up in the seventies and we had a different outlook. My dad clouted me periodically for doing something twatish like bringing a dead rat into the house that me and my mates had shot with our air rifles on the farms round by our house, but I would never have dreamed of thinking that was abuse!

I think he needs the snowflake removing!
Indeed it is fcuking hard. Just take the moral high road, and set expectations that he behaves as you expect. Nothing else you can do. The minute you indulge in appeasement, you're fcuked. Cut deals by all means, but make sure that X is justified by Y. No Y, no X. Can't say I'm an expert in this, but taking the high road appears to be the best route.

Kids don't come with an instruction manual :)
 
#12
You didn’t spank him hard enough, reckon I could do better.
His daughter is a gayer, you need to stay away from that type.

Apparently his daughters "bravery" on admitting to being a bean flicker is on par with those awarded the VC.
 
#13
It's ******* hard!

I let him know in no uncertain terms I was the adult and he shat himself! He has never had a real adult get stroppy with him. Perhaps that's the whole problem?



Anyway thanks for the advice. He needs to know what a loving home me and his mum have provided.

I grew up in the seventies and we had a different outlook. My dad clouted me periodically for doing something twatish like bringing a dead rat into the house that me and my mates had shot with our air rifles on the farms round by our house, but I would never have dreamed of thinking that was abuse!

I think he needs the snowflake removing!
Back in the day, my old man found hours upon hours of chores and “area beautification” projects for us to do. Try weeding an alley, it blows.

We also got “smoked” in football, at least back when that was allowed. Granted that is probably considered hazing these days.
 
#18
Deanol - Do not despair, lots of kids get like that in the early and late teens.
My son, against my wishes and the wishes of his mother dropped out of a good university after 18 months. He moved in with me and got a job at a garden center. I thought he would be selling plants and bushes forever and then one night he came home and asked if I could give him a check for US$250. I asked why and he said he had been accepted at a small but very rigorous university. Yes! he got the check.
For 4 years he did well, studying ancient Greek, French and Philosophy. I did wonder as I had never seen an ad "Help Wanted: Philosopher fluent in ancient Greek and French".
After he graduated he moved to California and got a job with a bank. Eight weeks later he got promoted. After a year he left to be a management trainee at a major firm of stockbrokers. He then went back to school part time and got an MBA at UCLA. He is now studying again for something called "Chartered Financial Analyst" No idea what that means but a cousin in banking says it is a big thing to do with very challenging exams to get it.

They will drive you nuts but they will eventually straighten themselves out. Just don't burn your bridges with him.
I have no idea what my son makes for money but last year for my 70th birthday he took me for a three week trip to Ireland. Flew first class for the first time in my life in my own little pod on the plane and stayed in very posh hotels. We had a great time. He said it was a partial thank you for putting up with him.

Most kids will work out fine, just hang in there. Even if he says he hates you he probably does love you.
Good luck!
 
#19
#20
He's bent, disown him, you brought up a worthless bedwetter, your fault.

Just let him **** off and not come home, he'll last about three days until he realises money doesn't just appear from nowhere and he doesn't own a duvet or any central heating
 

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