Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersexual, Asexual, Pansexual and Polygamous, and Kinkiness.
I've no idea what any of the above means, except I'm pretty sure lesbianism is like buying an electric train set. You get all excited but then find out there's no plug. Gay means you're happy, Queer means strange.
And finally, Asexual means like me, you're celibate, spend your spare time watching rugby, getting drunk and masturbating... Don't get nagged and have excesses of cash to spend.