Wheel Chair Jokes

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by EScotia, Dec 31, 2011.

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  1. Sandy was drinking at a pub all night. When he got up to leave, he fell flat on his face. He tried to stand again, but to no avail, falling flat on his face. He decided to crawl outside and get some fresh air to see whether that would sober him up. Once outside, he stood up and, sure enough, fell flat on his face. So, being a practical Scot, he crawled all the way home.
    When he got to the door, he stood up yet again, but fell flat on his face. He crawled through the door into his bedroom. When he reached his bed, he tried once more to stand upright. This time he managed to pull himself to his feet but fell into bed. He was sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow.
    He woke the next morning to his wife shaking him and shouting, "So, ye've been oot drinkin' as usual!" "Why would ye say that?" he complained innocently.
    "Because the pub called an' ye left yer wheelchair there again!"
     
  2. A young boy was born with terribly disfigured legs, totally unable to walk, many years passed with his parents in anguish at his disability, eventually some money was raised, and it was mutually agreed, they should send him to Lourdes. The day came, they lowered the poor lad into the holy water, after a short period they lifted him out, his legs were still horrifically twisted.
    They agreed they may have been hasty and decided to let him stay in the pool for a good 30 minutes.

    They lifted him out, his legs were still in a terrible state, the wheel chair had two new tyres.

    (Ken Loach- Raining Stones)
     
  3. Did you read the joke directly above yours?
     
  4. Whats the only part of a wheelchair you can eat?......................................................................................................................the vegetable..