Whats your wanking to actual sex ratio?

#1
Be honest now! How much wanking do you do compared to actual sex? I reckon I do about 40 times more wanking than sex. That is fourty wanks to every shag. So my ratio is 40:1. Pretty deppressing but then again I'm in a long term relationship so constant sex is a distant memory for me.

Anyone here actually have sex more than they masturbate?
 
#2
40 wanks per shag is a little on the high side even if you are quite young.

Either you are a serious w*nker and milk the bull more than twice a day which is remarkable, or you don't get laid a lot! As a married man I don't get laid alot either but if I was to have 40 w@nks for every shag I would be on 40-80 wanks per week (sad reflection) that is 6-11 wanks per day! My right arm would be like arnold swarcheneger's and my john thomas covered in blisters!

I would not like to be your corimec buddy!

Even though this thread is very funny it is as much use as the farts to shits ratio thread posted recently!
 
#3
I w@nk about 3 times a day. I bone my mrs probably once a fortnight.

So 3 wanks in 14 days is 42 wanks. Very occasionally I only w@nk twice a day and so I rounded it down to 40 wanks in 2 weeks.
 
#4
That is very modest of you rounding down from 42 to 40! You are a selling yourself short of two hard earned wanks!
 
#5
Chimpy. said:
I w@nk about 3 times a day. I bone my mrs probably once a fortnight.

So 3 wanks in 14 days is 42 wanks. Very occasionally I only w@nk twice a day and so I rounded it down to 40 wanks in 2 weeks.
I never miss my third one, and likewise get "it" once every fortnight therefore I am at 42:1!
 
#6
I knock out one or two a day, and last had my leg over at Easter.

Going off that, my ratio has to be close to the odds of Lord Lucan riding shergar to Elvis's comeback gig.
 
#7
Got you beat there matey, considering my ex was a frigid uptight fecker (one of the reasons she's my ex) its been a while, in fact Im hitting close to my army number:1 at the mo. :cry:
 
#8
Get it off the woman probably four times a week. Batter my purple headed monster into submission probably twice a day when not getting it, so 6:4 or 3:2. I think that's pretty fcuking good.
 
#9
oh dear ... away at the mo so my ratio is about 10,000-2 ( on tour shag ratio) not uk based... it's higher ;)
 
#11
Was ambling along at about 14:1 with the Mrs till i met a nubile 30 year old cracker, with her own place and an insatiable apetite for it. so now im nearer 2:1 and loving every minute. Did i mention she is also a 34 EE, and has no gag reflex (forcespenpals - god bless you!)
 
#12
You mean wanking isn't actual sex!!
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#13
What? You can do it with a woman? That is disgusting. Or so my missus tells me.
 
#14
No gag reflex - that's no fun, a throat fcuk isn't worth doing unless they blow chunks over your hampton.

As I live away from home during the week my current ratio is about 4:2, but I'm getting married on Saturday so I expect a rise to 1 or 2:14 for the duration of the honeymoon before a rapid fall to around 13:1 once we get back and the nagging starts.
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#15
Bat_crab;getting married on Saturday


Ok, it's not too late! Send us the details and we will organise a rescue. You have to move quickly though, since the rain has affected the zimmer frames of the Special Hostage Intervention Team ( S.H.I.T) But we can deprogram you, help you live a normal and useless, feckless and wasteful life. Again.


edited for crap spelling and apathy.
 
#16
Chimpy. said:
I w@nk about 3 times a day. I bone my mrs probably once a fortnight.

So 3 wanks in 14 days is 42 wanks. Very occasionally I only w@nk twice a day and so I rounded it down to 40 wanks in 2 weeks.

It'll take you a month to manually liberate almost a pint of semen then.
 
#17
old_fat_and_hairy said:
Bat_crab;getting married on Saturday


Ok, it's not too late! Send us the details and we will organise a rescue. You have to move quickly though, since the rain has affected the zimmer frames of the Special Hostage Intervention Team ( S.H.I.T) But we can deprogram you, help you live a normal and useless, feckless and wasteful life. Again.


edited for crap spelling and apathy.
FFS Bat Crab, it's not to late. Think of the children
 
#20
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