Whats to join the infantry (reserve) but fat

I am also lucky in that I was REME not PBI and have no issues from my time in the Army, just memories and a pension.
Did you also get a medal and a trade?


yeah, I know, but my taxi’s already here...
 
Thank you,

A general 'day' of food for me:

Breakfast:
Bacon and Egg sandwich
Can of coke

Dinner:
Cornish pasty and a bar of chocolate

Tea:
Some sort of home-made roast dinner or curry

I have got a sweet tooth and this is why I've got FBS (fat-bastard syndrome)

I am determined to get this weight off, and join the infantry reserves (3 RW). So will take your advice on the long walks and swimming.

Who'd have thought that the woke culture that comes out of University; yet, the food on campus is shit!
You are lying aren't you!

A fair few of us on here have PhD's, no soldiers are not thick, it is a lifestyle choice. Anyway, we know you are lying because you failed to mention the "pub based research meetings" that usually start at 17.00hrs and go on till 21.00hrs involving copious amounts of a fermented grain based libation followed by a visit to a pizza shack, or burger place.

Seriously, and I am going to be rude now, you fat twat why the fcuk are you drinking gut rotting coke for breakfast..........are you a fcuking American office drone? If I presented you with a glass of water, some brown food dye and 17 teaspoons of sugar would you get that down your neck? Well? Bacon AND egg butty? One filler or the other, but not both.

Moving on: A bar of chocolate for lunch, on top of a pasty. Nothing wrong with either once or twice a week, as a treat, but not on a daily basis. Chocolate, unless it is quality chocolate with a high caocao content, is nowadays basically nothing more than vegetable oil, sugar (on top of the 17 teaspoons you have already had), food clouring, and binding agents.

The pasty, well commercial bakeries tend to use copious quantities of vegetable oil rather than butter when baking as it helps preserve whatever it is they are presenting as a reasonable facsimile of food. Mix that in with the flour and it is like eating stodgy supermarket bread with oil on it. Not exactly health promoting.

Can't comment on your curry, or roast dinner, other than less spuds and more veggies.

I like sweet things too, I buy a jumbo sized box of muesli bars to satisfy that craving and I have around 2 a day........one mid morning and one for lunch. Sometimes I will make a bowl of porridge for lunch using water not milk, half a cup of oats, handful of cranberries and some honey. I got into porridge/oats a few years ago after reading about top athletes diets. Many of the top athletes, olympian's and the like, will more or less only have a bowl of porridge/oats with honey and a handful of something as their only proper meal till dinner time........energy snacks when training, but only the one porridge meal till dinner time.

Think of it this way: I like dunking rich tea biscuits when I am drinking a coffee in the afternoon. Tradition dictates I have 6 biscuits. Each biscuit is 40 calories+/-, so that is 240 calories. It takes 2'ish miles of running to burn off those 240 calories. Fine if you are doing the exercise, a recipe for fatness if you are not.

Good luck, and what is your research title?
 
Reserves means getting fit your way.

Most of us on Arrse joined in our late teens and immediately put on hard soled boots, webbing, picked up a rifle and commenced to run several hours a week on concrete or tarmac.

Our knees, collectively, are now buggered.

Bear in mind you'll have tests to prove your fitness based on running, and as an infantryman running in kit comes in to the job. Your training needs to support those future activities but not all your training has to be running.
The British Army, 20 year olds with the back and knees of 50 year olds, treated like 5 year olds.
 
The British Army, 20 year olds with the back and knees of 50 year olds, treated like 5 year olds.
do you include the AG Corps in that tarring with a wide brush, what about the Royal Army chaplains corps, I bet their knees are terrible, all that kneeling.
 
You are lying aren't you!

A fair few of us on here have PhD's, no soldiers are not thick, it is a lifestyle choice. Anyway, we know you are lying because you failed to mention the "pub based research meetings" that usually start at 17.00hrs and go on till 21.00hrs involving copious amounts of a fermented grain based libation followed by a visit to a pizza shack, or burger place.

Seriously, and I am going to be rude now, you fat twat why the fcuk are you drinking gut rotting coke for breakfast..........are you a fcuking American office drone? If I presented you with a glass of water, some brown food dye and 17 teaspoons of sugar would you get that down your neck? Well? Bacon AND egg butty? One filler or the other, but not both.

Moving on: A bar of chocolate for lunch, on top of a pasty. Nothing wrong with either once or twice a week, as a treat, but not on a daily basis. Chocolate, unless it is quality chocolate with a high caocao content, is nowadays basically nothing more than vegetable oil, sugar (on top of the 17 teaspoons you have already had), food clouring, and binding agents.

The pasty, well commercial bakeries tend to use copious quantities of vegetable oil rather than butter when baking as it helps preserve whatever it is they are presenting as a reasonable facsimile of food. Mix that in with the flour and it is like eating stodgy supermarket bread with oil on it. Not exactly health promoting.

Can't comment on your curry, or roast dinner, other than less spuds and more veggies.

I like sweet things too, I buy a jumbo sized box of muesli bars to satisfy that craving and I have around 2 a day........one mid morning and one for lunch. Sometimes I will make a bowl of porridge for lunch using water not milk, half a cup of oats, handful of cranberries and some honey. I got into porridge/oats a few years ago after reading about top athletes diets. Many of the top athletes, olympian's and the like, will more or less only have a bowl of porridge/oats with honey and a handful of something as their only proper meal till dinner time........energy snacks when training, but only the one porridge meal till dinner time.

Think of it this way: I like dunking rich tea biscuits when I am drinking a coffee in the afternoon. Tradition dictates I have 6 biscuits. Each biscuit is 40 calories+/-, so that is 240 calories. It takes 2'ish miles of running to burn off those 240 calories. Fine if you are doing the exercise, a recipe for fatness if you are not.

Good luck, and what is your research title?
Thank you!
Will take your advice on board; and will ignore the 'American Office Drone' regime!

Time Perception in Schizophrenics is the title of my Ph.D

Thanks for advice -- will take it on board!
 

Mrsheeny

War Hero
Best way to lose weight:

No carbs after 6pm, nothing to eat past 7:30pm.
1 small biscuit/bar a day, before 3pm.
Nothing fried, nothing beginning with C - chips, cream, cheese, chocolate etc.

Plenty veg, plenty protein.

Start cycling to your place of work/study. If not then join a gym and use the cross trainer, bike, watt bike, rower and stepper and keep your heart rate I’m zone 2 - the fat burning zone which for a 30 year old is between 114 and 133.

Add to that lift weights, lift heavy weights and your muscle will keep burning fat for 24 hours after, whereas when you do cardio you only burn fat whilst your doing it. Also when you do lose the weight you will have shape and not look like Freddie Mercury in ‘Those were the days of our lives’ video.
 
Best way to lose weight:

No carbs after 6pm, nothing to eat past 7:30pm.
1 small biscuit/bar a day, before 3pm.
Nothing fried, nothing beginning with C - chips, cream, cheese, chocolate etc.

Plenty veg, plenty protein.

Start cycling to your place of work/study. If not then join a gym and use the cross trainer, bike, watt bike, rower and stepper and keep your heart rate I’m zone 2 - the fat burning zone which for a 30 year old is between 114 and 133.

Add to that lift weights, lift heavy weights and your muscle will keep burning fat for 24 hours after, whereas when you do cardio you only burn fat whilst your doing it. Also when you do lose the weight you will have shape and not look like Freddie Mercury in ‘Those were the days of our lives’ video.
Thank you!
Live around 9 miles from my place of study, so will start cycling and cutting the pastries, as many have said
 
Interesting about walking.
It is something I have always enjoyed so I now know it gave me an advantage when I joined up.
In my day it was the only way to get anywhere.

I know some Arrsers are elderly, but you're not claiming to have been a youth before horses were invented, are you?
 

Funbaby

Old-Salt
PhD student and want to get fit eh?

Just wait til you get round to writing your thesis up; I was running 10 miles a day and doing an hour in the gym on top of that just to avoid crunching my carefully curated research data.
 

Sixty

ADC
Moderator
Book Reviewer
Thank you!
Live around 9 miles from my place of study, so will start cycling and cutting the pastries, as many have said
I usually find getting rid of excess timber pretty easy following this three step programme:

1. Aim not to breach 1500 calories a day.
2. Gym every second day - doesn't matter what you do, as long as you do something.
3. If you're on a night out, drink gin and soda.

That's pretty much it and the weight will fall off.
 
I usually find getting rid of excess timber pretty easy following this three step programme:

1. Aim not to breach 1500 calories a day.
2. Gym every second day - doesn't matter what you do, as long as you do something.
3. If you're on a night out, drink gin and soda.

That's pretty much it and the weight will fall off.
I'm trying to get rid of the excess timber (******* forest if I'm honest)

Don't do the gym tbh, but have a physical Job, get my arse out on the mountains come spring.
 
I got injured last year, and got a load of (arm) exercises to do from the physio. I added a few other exercises to the set, so it wasn't just the arms I was training, and did 3 rounds of the circuit pretty much every day (sometimes twice a day). This only took about 25 minutes each time, but I lost 5-6 kg in the space of a couple of months.

I wish I'd kept it up after I recovered. I could do with getting back into the habit of doing it to be honest.
 
You know if you are a fat boy, however do not forget BMI is not the greatest measure of fatness.
On BMI scale Anthony Joshua would be classed as overweight, and Usain Bolt in his prime was only just in healthy range, and the All Black winger Jonah Lomu was in obese range.
 
Thank you,

A general 'day' of food for me:

Breakfast:
Bacon and Egg sandwich
Can of coke

Dinner:
Cornish pasty and a bar of chocolate

Tea:
Some sort of home-made roast dinner or curry
This has got to be a wah.

Surely someone who has the mental capacity to study for a doctorate has the intellectual ability to release that the reason you’re fat is because you have an atrocious diet.

Luckily for you the remedy is simple. Don’t eat anything that you normally eat and do some research into what constitutes a healthy diet. (Which basically always comes down to “eat a balanced diet”.)

There are plenty of free apps, MyFitnessPal for example, which will help you monitor your macros and calorific intake. Eat fewer calories than you burn and you will lose weight. You can make this more efficient by making sure that the calories you do eat are nutritionally dense.

I.e: Cornish pastie vs homemade chicken wrap on whole meal tortilla.

Find a type of exercise/sport that you enjoy and do that. This will help you lose weight and start to gain fitness. You’ll bmi will need to be in a healthy range before the army will let you proceed anyway.
 
What everyone else has said - small changes to your lifestyle are better than fad diets you give up after a fortnight and reducing calories taken in is easier than using excess calories.

Binning the booze on weeknights will probably get half a kilogram or more lost per week without any other changes.

Best way to lose weight:

No carbs after 6pm, nothing to eat past 7:30pm.
1 small biscuit/bar a day, before 3pm.
Nothing fried, nothing beginning with C - chips, cream, cheese, chocolate etc.

Plenty veg, plenty protein.
Cauliflower, cabbage, carrots, cavolo nero, celery, cucumber or chillies? ;)
 
This has got to be a wah.

Surely someone who has the mental capacity to study for a doctorate has the intellectual ability to release that the reason you’re fat is because you have an atrocious diet.

Luckily for you the remedy is simple. Don’t eat anything that you normally eat and do some research into what constitutes a healthy diet. (Which basically always comes down to “eat a balanced diet”.)

There are plenty of free apps, MyFitnessPal for example, which will help you monitor your macros and calorific intake. Eat fewer calories than you burn and you will lose weight. You can make this more efficient by making sure that the calories you do eat are nutritionally dense.

I.e: Cornish pastie vs homemade chicken wrap on whole meal tortilla.

Find a type of exercise/sport that you enjoy and do that. This will help you lose weight and start to gain fitness. You’ll bmi will need to be in a healthy range before the army will let you proceed anyway.
Thank you
Appreciate the advice and will follow it
 
Thank you!
Live around 9 miles from my place of study, so will start cycling and cutting the pastries, as many have said
I had a lad who worked for me in the army who was ever so keen, but lived at home and liked his mum's home cooking along with the occasional schnelli (thats a take away to you non-German speakers). He was around 18 stone at 5'10" and it was all hidden up the front of his jumper.

We nagged him at work to start losing some weight so he started to cycle in everyday, only a few miles each way, and his mum started feeding him salads. The impact was noticeable within a month. As he got into cycling he bought himself a decent bike - made by the Belgian bloke who won the Tour de France. His mum and dad were taking the caravan to the South of France for the summer and I approved 4 weeks leave for him to go with them. Whilst he was down there he did some serious distance every day and was down to around 13 stone by the end of the summer. He got involved in the BAOR cycling events and was placed in the top dozen or so for quite a few events. He did really well going from fat knacker to cycling god in under 12 months.
 
What everyone else has said - small changes to your lifestyle are better than fad diets you give up after a fortnight and reducing calories taken in is easier than using excess calories.

Binning the booze on weeknights will probably get half a kilogram or more lost per week without any other changes.


Cauliflower, cabbage, carrots, cavolo nero, celery, cucumber or chillies? ;)
...clitorises?
 

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