When I was born my Father wanted to name me after a day of the week. I know this because I can remember him peering into my cot and saying to my Mother " Fuck me luv, I think we oughta call it a day. ! A good few years later I inadvertently walked into Mum and Dads bedroom whilst he was giving her the biggest rodgering she'd had since last paying the rent man. I stood in awe for a second before Dad extended his right leg and caught me one right in the bollocks then gave me some fatherly advice "Fuck off you nosey little twat and go play with your train set" This hurt me considerably. About 10 mins later there was a blood curdling scream from my Grandmas room and Dad came charging in to find me giving Gran the biggest boning she'd had since 1918. "You dirty little scrote bag, what the fuck are you doing" Ah-ha I said - YOU DONT FUCKING LIKE IT WHEN ITS YOUR MOTHER DO YOU ?"