Whatever happened to (insert ARRSE member here)?

Boris_Johnson

ADC
Moderator
DirtyBAT
Having been following this thread it's become apparent that members past, fall into two distinct categories:

1. Legendary swordsmen with varying degrees of Regular Army Service. Masters of put-downs, eloquent in the arts of embellished fables and borderline sexual perverts.

2. Cunts.

I was going to write a more descriptive explanation of #2 but seeing some of the names of past "members" (in every sense of the word) compels me to prevent their sharing any more of the limelight than they already undeservedly stole in the past.

Indeed, it is my firm belief the reason a lot of names from #1 are no longer with us due to those who fall into #2, and the site has become a sort of exile for old men with an unhealthy interest in politics, depression, alcohol abuse, small genitalia... and the SLR.

And it's not because those in #2 "won". At the end of the day you can only amalgamate so many clag-nuts around your hairy clacker before you just think "fuck it - I'm having a shower later anyway".

Shame really.
 
Having been following this thread it's become apparent that members past, fall into two distinct categories:

1. Legendary swordsmen with varying degrees of Regular Army Service. Masters of put-downs, eloquent in the arts of embellished fables and borderline sexual perverts.

2. cnuts.

I was going to write a more descriptive explanation of #2 but seeing some of the names of past "members" (in every sense of the word) compels me to prevent their sharing any more of the limelight than they already undeservedly stole in the past.

Indeed, it is my firm belief the reason a lot of names from #1 are no longer with us due to those who fall into #2, and the site has become a sort of exile for old men with an unhealthy interest in politics, depression, alcohol abuse, small genitalia... and the SLR.

And it's not because those in #2 "won". At the end of the day you can only amalgamate so many clag-nuts around your hairy clacker before you just think "**** it - I'm having a shower later anyway".

Shame really.
I gave that a like, because I like to think if I flounced off, I’d be in category 1.
However, your description of the current site demographic - “old men with an unhealthy.............and small genitalia” is worryingly accurate! :smile:
 

Boris_Johnson

ADC
Moderator
DirtyBAT
I gave that a like, because I like to think if I flounced off, I’d be in category 1.
However, your description of the current site demographic - “old men with an unhealthy.............and small genitalia” is worryingly accurate! :smile:
I too have a small penis, but I don't seem to tick any of the other boxes.

It's not just ARRSE though - having a flick through any type of social media and it's awash with "Anxiety Awareness", "Suicide Awareness", "Depression is very real", fucking plastic rubbish fundraisers, someone's kid getting into a certain school due to being bi-polar, pictures of "beautiful" downie kids you must "have the guts to share", coping with autism... peppered in amongst that lot, you've got a load of fat cunts on bikes running about the place, calling on their beer-swilling, tab-smoking BAOR days to pretend they're with Soldier X,Y,Z or something, along with outrage over the lack of press coverage it's drawn... the only let up seems to be when somebody posts a picture of their smashed avocado and poached eggs that has already been posted by 26 of their "friends" and checking into the gym (purely to use the Jacuzzi and get a free shower) to prove they're not fat cunts after all and the weight must have magic'd itself to their gunts instead...

I flick through this lot when I'm at my most bored (which is hardly ever) and think to myself - am I the only one left who's got a single personality, not depressed, anxious or overweight?

I admit I look a little downie but fuck me - it appears the world is full of broken headed turds and I suppose it was only a matter of a time before they started infesting sanctuaries like ARRSE.

I love Mondays.
 

Auld-Yin

ADC
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
Having been following this thread it's become apparent that members past, fall into two distinct categories:

1. Legendary swordsmen with varying degrees of Regular Army Service. Masters of put-downs, eloquent in the arts of embellished fables and borderline sexual perverts.

2. cnuts.

I was going to write a more descriptive explanation of #2 but seeing some of the names of past "members" (in every sense of the word) compels me to prevent their sharing any more of the limelight than they already undeservedly stole in the past.

Indeed, it is my firm belief the reason a lot of names from #1 are no longer with us due to those who fall into #2, and the site has become a sort of exile for old men with an unhealthy interest in politics, depression, alcohol abuse, small genitalia... and the SLR.

And it's not because those in #2 "won". At the end of the day you can only amalgamate so many clag-nuts around your hairy clacker before you just think "**** it - I'm having a shower later anyway".

Shame really.
You could also join the "whatever happened to" group.

It is noticeable how many of them were Mods!
 
I too have a small penis, but I don't seem to tick any of the other boxes.

It's not just ARRSE though - having a flick through any type of social media and it's awash with "Anxiety Awareness", "Suicide Awareness", "Depression is very real", ******* plastic rubbish fundraisers, someone's kid getting into a certain school due to being bi-polar, pictures of "beautiful" downie kids you must "have the guts to share", coping with autism... peppered in amongst that lot, you've got a load of fat cnuts on bikes running about the place, calling on their beer-swilling, tab-smoking BAOR days to pretend they're with Soldier X,Y,Z or something, along with outrage over the lack of press coverage it's drawn... the only let up seems to be when somebody posts a picture of their smashed avocado and poached eggs that has already been posted by 26 of their "friends" and checking into the gym (purely to use the Jacuzzi and get a free shower) to prove they're not fat cnuts after all and the weight must have magic'd itself to their gunts instead...

I flick through this lot when I'm at my most bored (which is hardly ever) and think to myself - am I the only one left who's got a single personality, not depressed, anxious or overweight?

I admit I look a little downie but **** me - it appears the world is full of broken headed turds and I suppose it was only a matter of a time before they started infesting sanctuaries like ARRSE.

I love Mondays.
It's not all bad. Even during the Golden Age, the mongs were among us, including Golden himself.

Despite everything, Arrse remains one of the more free thinking areas of the internet and I'm encouraged by the fact that a certain sort of person still finds the site deeply offensive. Thanks to the abortion thread, I was able to perfect my utilitarian defence of the wholesale murder of the unborn criminal underclass and deploy it at a dinner party on Saturday, to the great dismay of feminists and fundamentalists alike.

What other site has such an eclectic collection of experts across a range of arcane subjects, not to mention Russian Spooks, Indian racists posting from open sewers, drug-addled Irishmen who've been murdered twice or Higgs_bosun fulminating from his portacabin in West Bromwich?
 

Boris_Johnson

ADC
Moderator
DirtyBAT
Oh yeah that thread is a cracker.

I actually thought it started pretty worthwhile - there are some proper genuine cases - people who have been through more shit than even my fucked up imagination could dream up. But it wasn't long before it attracted it's very own #metoo movement of queegs feeling "a little bit down" having failed miserably at life and looking for anything to blame but themselves.
 
You could also join the "whatever happened to" group.

It is noticeable how many of them were Mods!
Mostly done for by a toxic combination of Ishtar, AMMM, Arrse Socials and the Battle of Gibson's Dog.
 

Boris_Johnson

ADC
Moderator
DirtyBAT
You could also join the "whatever happened to" group.

It is noticeable how many of them were Mods!
Indeed.

There was that JesterRIP bloke.

Funny, handsome bugger he was.

Only downside was with him being REME there was a 95.7% chance of him fucking kids...
 

AlienFTM

MIA
Book Reviewer
I too have a small penis. It's not half the size it used to be. I blame it on all the steroids I've taken in the last 20 years for various conditions. I mean a 17 foot penis is about adequate for a dashing cavalryman, but entirely inadequate for an alien.
 
Having been following this thread it's become apparent that members past, fall into two distinct categories:

1. Legendary swordsmen with varying degrees of Regular Army Service. Masters of put-downs, eloquent in the arts of embellished fables and borderline sexual perverts.

2. cnuts.

I was going to write a more descriptive explanation of #2 but seeing some of the names of past "members" (in every sense of the word) compels me to prevent their sharing any more of the limelight than they already undeservedly stole in the past.

Indeed, it is my firm belief the reason a lot of names from #1 are no longer with us due to those who fall into #2, and the site has become a sort of exile for old men with an unhealthy interest in politics, depression, alcohol abuse, small genitalia... and the SLR.

And it's not because those in #2 "won". At the end of the day you can only amalgamate so many clag-nuts around your hairy clacker before you just think "**** it - I'm having a shower later anyway".

Shame really.
Distinct? I suspect one mans "Swordsman" is another mans Cunt.
 
Just so you know, we're both on holiday (not together. Zero Alpha might have something to say..). We've been chatting and exchanging postcards. She says she's only got her phone and hasn't got her Arrse password and besides, being on her hollibobs, she has better things to do with her time (hairdos, manicures, etc) than listen to the Arrserati sh¡tcúnts dribbling about losing Jeremy Kyle from their telly.

And she says to tell @wheel he types like a fúcking chimp. She can read but not post.
Are you pair still on holiday (but not together) and is it a NHS resort ?.
 

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