What Should Legs Do With Her Penis?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Tartan_Terrier, Sep 10, 2007.

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  1. As time goes by, and the date of the operation gets closer, I'm sure that Legs has been doing a lot of thinking on this subject. While it is of course, her penis, and she can do whatever she wants with it, I'm sure that some ARRSErs may have some creative suggestions that she perhaps wouldn't have thought of otherwise.

    If I may be so bold as to offer a few to start with:

    1. Sell it on Ebay.de including a sauté pan and a bottle of Chianti in the lot. Perhaps Armin Meiwes will buy it?

    2. Sell it on Ebay.co.uk as being "Genuine British Army". If the walts don't buy it, perhaps an SCH will be tempted.

    3. Have it tanned and cured, then use it as an instrument of chastisement for when the kids get out of hand. "Any more of your nonsense and I'll get my cock out!"

    4. Or indeed do as as suggested by theoriginalphantom, and donate it to the Icelandic Penis Museum.


    Any more ideas?

  2. Ram it up her ARRSE?
    That’s where all good girls keep their ding dongs :D

    Send it to MDN?
    He’s been asking to see legs mangina for months now.
  3. I intend to have my testicles encased in a clear plastic cube as a paperweight.

    One day I'll have some sproggy little git who needs a good shoeing. I'll remind him that I need another pair for a set of bookends...
  4. Send it to a taxidermist - then when someone says "go fuck yourself" (normally an anatomical impossibility) she can literally do so.
  5. He could always use her testicles as king size nipples :twisted:

    Has it had her boob job yet?
  6. Wouldn't that entail forcing it back into its original skin? Does that count? :?
  7. Do you get to keep it?

    Surely as a bird you'll be offered more than your fair share anyway!
  8. put it in the bag of goodies at halloween??

    to to a nice place order a fance meal (bangers and mash maybe) stick it in the mash and get a free meal...

    put you nackers on the door and us them as knockers.

    fix the old tinker on a drill and have some fun
  9. Ord_Sgt

    Ord_Sgt RIP

    She could give it to sven he's a cockless wonder.
  10. Surely you jest Sir?

    Do not be fooled by her avatar. In reality Legs' legs look more like those of an elderly elephant with elephantitus in the joints with a nice purple mottling effect caused by the advanced leprosy and ulcers (which at least disguise the varicose viens and various thromboses with litter the surface).
  11. I like it!

    And if someone was being a bit spineless, you could always tell them to "Grow a pair........or just borrow mine"
  12. Could donate it to medical science as a scaled down model of a real knob.
  13. Don't see why she'd bother keeping it. If she needs one, that's what closing time is for.
  14. Why? They look nothing like Caubeen....
  15. There's a weird little shop in Newquay... can't think of the name. But it has an eye popping assortment of all kinds of weird and wonderful things of a bizarre nature on display.

    Medical jars and cabinets are filled with oddities such as 5 headed stuffed animals, alien babies pickled in preservatives, potions and bones of long dead witches.

    Rumour has it that someone stole the jam jar containing...
    The Original, one and only PANCHO VILLA'S TRIGGER FINGER!...

    ... it's just a thought! :wink: