What passes for humour among the PC brigade



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'Dave' viewers, who, by definition have the memory-loop of a goldfish.

This, from the comments section is funnier;
Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque...
They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it inside.


Book Reviewer
These are the also-rans:

2.Alex Horne - "I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying."
3.Alfie Moore - "I'm in a same-sex marriage... the sex is always the same."
4.Tim Vine - "My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him 'Don't be Sicily'."
5.Gary Delaney - "I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell."
6.Phil Wang - "The Pope is a lot like Doctor Who. He never dies, just keeps being replaced by white men."
7.Marcus Brigstocke - "You know you are fat when you hug a child and it gets lost."
8.Liam Williams - "The universe implodes. No matter."
9.Bobby Mair - "I was adopted at birth and have never met my mum. That makes it very difficult to enjoy any lapdance."
10.Chris Coltrane - "The good thing about lending someone your time machine is that you basically get it back immediately."

Courtesy of Auntie
What a load of unfunny PC shit.

What's wrong with mild sexism/racism/homophobia, it never harmed anyone.
After reading the article , I spied the 2008 winner.

2008: Zoe Lyons - "I can't believe Amy Winehouse self-harms. She's so irritating she must be able to find someone to do it for her."

That's more like it.


And if you had a choice between having the wealth of Bill Gates or eradicating hunger in the whole of the African continent, what colour Ferrari would you choose?


Book Reviewer
Why do seagulls have wings?
So they can beat the Pikies to the rubbish dump.

Arrse should take a show to the Fringe - just for the shock value.
When you can't make jokes about, religion, race, geographic location, disability, eye colour. Then that is what you are left with.
What a load of unfunny PC shit.

What's wrong with mild sexism/racism/homophobia, it never harmed anyone.
Numbers 1, 3 and 6 covers them.

Has anyone on here ever come up with a NEW joke? Not a pun or a rehash of something they were told but a new one?

Not easy.
But what material would be used from the vast repository that is Arrse to ensure maximum outrage?
Just resurrect the Mong threads and read them out, guaranteed to be offensive to nearly everyone whilst at the same time causing tears of laughter across the land.
How about a monologue based on RTFQ's thread about his penis?

Just need to find a suitable talking head.


Book Reviewer
Don't worry - the Telegraph has just published the least funny jokes from the Fringe.

Least funny jokes of 2013 Edinburgh Fringe - Telegraph

• Simon Lilley - “I thought ex-pats were people who used to be called Pat.”

• Geoff Norcott - “My wife said to me recently, ‘Do you fancy going gay clubbing?’ I said, ‘No, it sounds violent’.”

• Tim Vine - “I once did a gig in a zoo. I got babooned off.”

• Ben Van Der Velde - “Swastika in Geordie means something that used to be a sticker.”

• Nikhil Tiwali - “What do you call a pink flower that comes back from the dead? A re-in-carnation.”

• Pat Cahill - “90 per cent of baking injuries are stress-related. There are people up and down the country having mental bake-downs.”

• Pajama Men (Shenoah Allen and Mark Chavez) - "I'm a head gardener. Whatever I say grows."

• Alex Horne - "I want to talk about something that's close to my heart. My lungs."

• Romesh Ranganathan - "I'm married with kids. I don't need to look good, I just need to look better than the prospect of single parentdom."
Ho fcuking ho....


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