What now for the EU ?

Only 94 more needed to complete the book. Thanks.
Number 53....Vin au Vin.?
It;s an ice bucket full of wine served with a rich side dressing of wine , inspired by best selling wine diet book by Jean Claude Junker
 
Number 53....Vin au Vin.?
It;s an ice bucket full of wine served with a rich side dressing of wine , inspired by best selling wine diet book by Jean Claude Junker
It sounds absolutely delicious but alas, it has no place in my book. Remember, the book is for the UK living in the apocalyptic post brexit winter. The rich will have eau de pluie fraîche to drink and the less rich, Chateaux du Puddle 2021.


The ever popular stake and woodchips.
93.

92.

This cook book writing lark is piss easy.
 
Seems to be a lack of desserts so far.
What about white dog turd on a bed of frog spawn.
It's s a fair facsimile of white chocolate drizzled over a bed of sago.
 
Seems to be a lack of desserts so far.
What about white dog turd on a bed of frog spawn.
It's s a fair facsimile of white chocolate drizzled over a bed of sago.
White dog turd is as rare as... well, it's as rare as white dog turd in fact. Where, in their post brexit, dirt eating existences are people going to get the money to buy exceedingly rare delicacies like that.

You’ll be suggesting hors d'oeuvres of finest Beluga Caviar, Iberico Ham and Fois Gras next. Mind you, they are probably less rare than white dog turd.
 
White dog turd is as rare as... well, it's as rare as white dog turd in fact. Where, in their post brexit, dirt eating existences are people going to get the money to buy exceedingly rare delicacies like that.

You’ll be suggesting hors d'oeuvres of finest Beluga Caviar, Iberico Ham and Fois Gras next. Mind you, they are probably less rare than white dog turd.
Even post brexit there will be a nomenclature, who can afford the finer things in life.
 
Even post brexit there will be a nomenclature, who can afford the finer things in life.
Indeed there will but come on... those who can afford white dog turd canapes are not the sort of people who'll be buying a copy of “100 Delicious Dirt Dishes to Die For”.

Enough of my fine book though and back to 'What Now For The EU’.
 
Well colour me surprised:


Germany simply cannot afford to prop up the EU financially as well as not be able to trade freely with the UK. We can quite simply afford to walk away - they cannot.
And exactly the reason we should just wander off. Preferably sticking two fingers up.over our shoulder as we bimble off.

Stuff the b'stards.
 
I really hope the ‘great branes’ are not wrong otherwise I’ll have wasted a large chunk of my valuable pre-Brexit life...

My book,”100 Delicious Dirt Dishes to Die For“, due for release on January 1st 2021, is almost finished and ready to go to print. (Just needs another 96 delectable dishes to go with the four already created and it is done).
  • Dirt and twig consomme
  • Boiled Dirt with fallen dried leaves gently seasoned with the delicate flavours of builders sand and mildew
  • Pan fried free range Dirt with twice fried gravel chips
  • Mud Mousse made with newly gathered dirt and fresh rain water
Book signings will be arranged and for Arrse I will do limited edition signed copies.
It sounds bizarre, but one of my sons is a carpenter with a major sideline in building 'mud kitchens'.

I'd never heard of them before, but are of a wooden construction with steel bowls and hanging utensils, which the kids use to mix the sort of shit being put forward in this threads 'menus'.

They're all the rage with pre school, junior school and nurseries, where the kids strive to get as much shit as possible ingrained into themselves and their clothes.

My lad charges an outrageous amount for these things, and he can't build them quick enough.

I may offer to distribute, for a small fee, any 'cookbook' which comes to 'fruitation'.
 

UncivilServant

Old-Salt
Having spent much of the last 8 weeks digging, sieving, sewing seeds and learning about the wonders of composting and 'well rotted manure' , I have (re) learned the value of quality - tools in this case.

And having exactly the right tool for the job.

So I went to these people
Burgon & Ball | Leading Garden Tools & Agricultural Supplies
who have been making tools - in Sheffield - for about 250 years.

Yes - it costs twice as much as Made in China BUT it is exactly the right tool for the job, it comes with a Lifetime Guarantee ( remember them ?) it kept a British taxpayer employed and it didnt come ashore contaminated with Chinese Plague.
Yeah, but...Sheffield?
 
I may offer to distribute, for a small fee, any 'cookbook' which comes to 'fruitation'.
You understand that my book will not have too much fruit in it. Lots of dirt, twigs and fallen leaves but very little fruit - there won’t be much about as it nearly all comes from or through the EU.

Your offer to distribute for free though... most generous and for managing to get the word 'fruitation' into the thread, I am prepared to consider you as my distributor. I don’t suppose you could see your way clear to reducing your fee a little though?
 

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