What New Businesses can Survive the Recession?

Discussion in 'Jobs (Discussion)' started by Hellmans, Apr 26, 2011.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Sat in traffic today, seeing all the trade vans going the other way, I got to thinking.................

    what new business could rise above the recession and make a go of it? Obviously more relevant with all the forthcoming redundencies.

    Obvious thought was a Pawnbroker, feeding off other's misfortune but you'd need stacks of capital to do that.

    So what else is ripe for a try during shit times?
  2. Debt Collector/Receiver
  3. Window Cleaner, there'll always be dirty windows and women who have to have them squeaky clean.

    Undertaker, there'll always be ***** dying.
  4. Alsacien

    Alsacien LE Moderator

    Replacing end-of-life fire extinguishers.
    If you don't, your insurance can become invalid - what a scam!
  5. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Owt to do with gardens - one of the few retail sectors that is growing. Making garden furniture doesnt require much cash - some timber and power tools.
  6. Any kind of personal counsellor, after 13 years of New Labour nothings your fault anymore and you needn't take any repsonsibility for your actions! The state will pay you to doss around, binge eating and boozing, smoking dope and knocking out kids which will follow your example. When you cannot cope with all that there are legions of state funded "big brothers" to take the pressure off.
    As long as you can "cry like a pussy" on demand and show no ability to cope with life, yet still believe you can go on a TV reality programme and make your god given right to fame and fortune!!
  7. A hedge fund manager or indeed an investment banker!!!
  8. Security.

    An ever present requirement for some. Fierce market at the minute, bone ex squaddies and redundant taxi drivers are typically the officers that will work for peanuts, unlimited resource of bodies via websites and job centre that require just a cursory check, confirmation of current SIA licence a big shiny jacket and a pair of working eyes and ears. Offer them a zero hours contract and you get yourself a nice little harem of interchangeable and work hungry blokes of the swarthy skinned nature, the majority of which are in receipt of Job Seekers Allowance. Dont ask dont tell ..

    Very competitive at the minute, no one is assured of continuance of contract, tenders being fought over and the winning deal at the minute is the offering of short term contracts and in some cases no contract at all allowing for the client to bump you on and off if required, this suits building sites, warehouse/freight/haulage affairs where minimal customer facing ability is required, in essence, barrier up, barrier down, patrol, wet, barrier up, barrier down ect ..

    You can set up from home, apply for a non front line manager badge for the interim, go to the usual sources for tenders and if your half awake and have a semblance of knowledge about the industry you stand a fair chance. Your firm doesnt have to be SIA registered, you do for management purposes and so do your guys but an 'ISO' type chod validation will do.

    Much pennies to be made, a 'double up' for a 24 hour 7 day site will typically bring in just over 3k a week at a charge of £9 - £10 per body. Nominal cost for uniform and maybe the provision of a site phone and your laughing.

    Stay away from doors, take aways ect, too much hassle and far too many variables.

    A handful of contracts at the minute are bringing in shovel loads for a mate.
  9. Business not a job! I'm thinking about people who want to go it alone,
  10. udipur

    udipur LE Book Reviewer

    Pizza delivery. Throw in a vid with it and you're onto a winning service.
  11. If it's so competitive there must be more losers than winners?
  12. Absolutely, you unfortunately also have to cut your own throat a few times before seeing a return.
  13. Still I suppose with increasing crime due to the recession, loads more pikey metal thefts, the need for site security will rise!
  14. whores. there are always takers.
  15. Undertaking, good recession = lots of suicides, good for business.

    When business gets slack, you can always go out and cut a few throats, strangle a few whores, smother the grannies etc.!