What is the most sick and offensive thing you can remember

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by compoman, Aug 1, 2012.

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  1. Reading some of the stuff on here has brought a whole lot of memories flooding back some i and doubtless others concerned would would rather forget.

    My own personal horror takes place in 1978.
    Imagine the scene two young virile and outrageously handsome paras on the lookout for a saturday night post globetrotter and kfc.

    Sitting in the park scoffing away we are met by two of aldershots finest beautys
    ( fcucking amazing what beer can do to your eysight).

    Anyway the upshot was they found us just too bloody gorgeous and desirable to resist and we ended up back at the flat they both shared.

    What comes next is a bit unsetteling as the individual involved is now a priest.

    There we are back at thier place me laid back getting noshed . Mitch (name obscured to protect the in no way innocent) is down on her mate munching away the next thing i know is he says hay look at this turns to show me the tampax (other femenin products are available) hanging from his teeth blood splattered all round his face.

    What a fcucking animal he was but a brilliant bloke. If he goes on here and reads this he will probably turn catholic.
     
  2. Wow that is so shocking and Offensive, I'm shocked and offended.

    Yawn
     
  3. Back in the day me and this "lad" I knew were out on the lash in Aldershot.

    My mate hadn't long been back from Thailand after getting his cock turned inside out by some gook doctor, so I thought I'd offer him some moral support and dress up as a lady also.

    Anyhow, it's late o'clock, and we're on out way back to his grot for some more beers and some arm wrestling when we spot these 2 ugly cunts in the park having some scran.

    John (now Joanne) fancied trying out "his" new minge so she bowls over and chats them up. 10 mins later we're all back at "his" place.

    For a giggle I'm noshing off this young para lad, and "Joanne" is firing into his mate. His mate pulls out Joannes tampax that was stuffed up him to help with the bleeding stitches.

    Oh....how we laughed in the morning.
     
    • Like Like x 5
  4. Excellent by fuck you give a good blow job though and thanks for swollowing i hate a doris that spits
     
  5. Your mum taught me everything I know :)

    I've seen babies with bigger cocks.

    Female ones ;)
     
  6. odd i couldnt find one on you and as for bollocks well i thought you just had a couple of zits
     
  7. I once fucked your mum and she had a cunt like an abattoir's bin!
     
  8. You were feeling my pimply arrse.
     
  9. Men!

    You are disgusting creatures!
     
  10. no i was fcucking you pimply arse sqealing like a little fvuck pig.
     
  11. Without the common decency to give me a reach-around.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  12. Nothing to reach around for
     
    • Like Like x 1
  13. It's not my fault that your parents were related before marriage, which resulted in you having stumpy flid arms that weren't long enough.
     
  14. no need to get personal