What do you want for Christmas ?

#1
So what do you want for Christmas ? And no before some smart arse says it I'm not thinking of buying the entire member ship of AARSE a prezzie. My missus has done her usual 'Its the first of December...I want a Christmas list from you'. Problem is I'm well paid and basically buy what I want, when I want, within reason anyway.
So my question is What do you all want for Christmas ? Maybe It'll give me some ideas and stop her nagging me !
 
#3
The missus and I decided years ago not to do chrissy prezzies, we get what we need/want as and when throughout the year, money permiting.

TID, I feel sorry for you having to scrape a few shillings together. NOT
 
#4
So what do you want for Christmas ? And no before some smart arse says it I'm not thinking of buying the entire member ship of AARSE a prezzie. My missus has done her usual 'Its the first of December...I want a Christmas list from you'. Problem is I'm well paid and basically buy what I want, when I want, within reason anyway.
So my question is What do you all want for Christmas ? Maybe It'll give me some ideas and stop her nagging me !
I'm basically in your shoes, a bottle of a decent single malr will do it for me.
 
#5
#8
Never mind that mincer for mincers sheit!!.. What is the world coming to when you got to buy a friggin! Haggis Making Kit!!??

What's to making haggis? Take all the naughty and disgusting parts of a sheep, stuffit in another sheep's guts and boil the basterd until the smell doesn't knock anyone over.. add gallons of Scotch.

Have the mighty Scots race fallen so low that some mail order firm, no doubt located in some foreign shore, has to sell them the 'secret' to making Haggis?
And what do you get for your 10 quid? Ground meat [d'uh!] and a beef intestine to shove it in.

FFS!!!
 
#10
So what do you want for Christmas ? And no before some smart arse says it I'm not thinking of buying the entire member ship of AARSE a prezzie. My missus has done her usual 'Its the first of December...I want a Christmas list from you'. Problem is I'm well paid and basically buy what I want, when I want, within reason anyway.
So my question is What do you all want for Christmas ? Maybe It'll give me some ideas and stop her nagging me !
Just tell her you want one weekends free ticket to diddle any attractive female relatives or friends she might have.

She'll never ask you again and will just go back to getting you some tat from Menkind or Red Letter Days.

Sent from my BlackBerry 9800 using Crapatalk and a head dobber
 
#11
Johnny 7 Seven Topper OMA Original Gun Set Bare | eBay

A Johnny 7 [linky for those who don't know what I am talking about] but with all the bits and a box.
Wanted one as a kid, and well dis-chuffed when I didn't get one. Coz Santa was skint that year
Now that I have the dosh, can't find one at a reasonable price with all the bits
 
#12
I tried Haggis once in Edinburgh I didn't like it. It's just dirty but I'm sure it's ok for the poor.

You are going soft and the poor will get way above their station with real animal products on their menus. Let the fuckers eat cardboard. That why we recycle it. Isn't it
 
#14
I would like all the soldiers home for xmas
World peace
All the little pikkininnies to have enough to eat
And last but by no means least - a 12" cock. (of my own - attached to me - just to clear that one up)
 
#15
I would like all the soldiers home for xmas
World peace
All the little pikkininnies to have enough to eat
And last but by no means least - a 12" cock. (of my own - attached to me - just to clear that one up)
We can't afford world peace. Redundancy to 100,000ish soldiers, not to mention the weapons developers, sales staff and the money made from exports.
 
#16
Co-joined twins from the Somme dwelling Frog French Teacher I think I've knocked up, tried everything to encourage termination (too late I think) but maybe a scan of two babies fused together at the head and spine with big spacka hands might do the trick, that or a carelessly mislaid roller boot on the steps and a couple of comedy banana skins ?
 
G

goatrutar

Guest
#17
Co-joined twins from the Somme dwelling Frog French Teacher I think I've knocked up, tried everything to encourage termination (too late I think) but maybe a scan of two babies fused together at the head and spine with big spacka hands might do the trick, that or a carelessly mislaid roller boot on the steps and a couple of comedy banana skins ?
You need this,

yabbie pump.jpg

this,

bamix.jpg

And some Rohypnol.

After you've used these items on le frog wench, buy some condoms you silly cunt.
 
#18
Either a garmin GPS watch or a polar one. Not sure which is the best one.
 
#20
Co-joined twins from the Somme dwelling Frog French Teacher I think I've knocked up, tried everything to encourage termination (too late I think) but maybe a scan of two babies fused together at the head and spine with big spacka hands might do the trick, that or a carelessly mislaid roller boot on the steps and a couple of comedy banana skins ?
You daft knacker, may I suggest the following:


 

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