What do you want for Christmas ?

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Peter-Pan, Dec 1, 2012.

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  1. So what do you want for Christmas ? And no before some smart arse says it I'm not thinking of buying the entire member ship of AARSE a prezzie. My missus has done her usual 'Its the first of December...I want a Christmas list from you'. Problem is I'm well paid and basically buy what I want, when I want, within reason anyway.
    So my question is What do you all want for Christmas ? Maybe It'll give me some ideas and stop her nagging me !
  2. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Tell her you want a punch in the gob you smug cunt.
    • Like Like x 14
  3. The missus and I decided years ago not to do chrissy prezzies, we get what we need/want as and when throughout the year, money permiting.

    TID, I feel sorry for you having to scrape a few shillings together. NOT
  4. I'm basically in your shoes, a bottle of a decent single malr will do it for me.
    • Like Like x 1
  5. rubber fist.jpg
    • Like Like x 2
  6. Never mind that mincer for mincers sheit!!.. What is the world coming to when you got to buy a friggin! Haggis Making Kit!!??

    What's to making haggis? Take all the naughty and disgusting parts of a sheep, stuffit in another sheep's guts and boil the basterd until the smell doesn't knock anyone over.. add gallons of Scotch.

    Have the mighty Scots race fallen so low that some mail order firm, no doubt located in some foreign shore, has to sell them the 'secret' to making Haggis?
    And what do you get for your 10 quid? Ground meat [d'uh!] and a beef intestine to shove it in.

  7. I tried Haggis once in Edinburgh I didn't like it. It's just dirty but I'm sure it's ok for the poor.
    • Like Like x 1
  8. Just tell her you want one weekends free ticket to diddle any attractive female relatives or friends she might have.

    She'll never ask you again and will just go back to getting you some tat from Menkind or Red Letter Days.

    Sent from my BlackBerry 9800 using Crapatalk and a head dobber
  9. Johnny 7 Seven Topper OMA Original Gun Set Bare | eBay

    A Johnny 7 [linky for those who don't know what I am talking about] but with all the bits and a box.
    Wanted one as a kid, and well dis-chuffed when I didn't get one. Coz Santa was skint that year
    Now that I have the dosh, can't find one at a reasonable price with all the bits

  10. You are going soft and the poor will get way above their station with real animal products on their menus. Let the fuckers eat cardboard. That why we recycle it. Isn't it
    • Like Like x 1
  11. They can eat grass of course.
  12. I would like all the soldiers home for xmas
    World peace
    All the little pikkininnies to have enough to eat
    And last but by no means least - a 12" cock. (of my own - attached to me - just to clear that one up)
    • Like Like x 3
  13. We can't afford world peace. Redundancy to 100,000ish soldiers, not to mention the weapons developers, sales staff and the money made from exports.